#i might.. make more than one just for kris's different verses.

[me-sploh-rada-imas]

so i wrote down everything kris said in the spoken part of the q&a bit of the discord live thing and shared it on the joblr discord, but @leopardom suggested i collate it all here as well!

will there be an mv?

yes, definitely, cannot say exactly when. but we have a very good idea for it and i can't say anything right now. a lot of our balkan fans will be very excited about it. we might drop it after the song gets an x amount of streams. maybe 500,000 or something like that. i am not the person who decides.

how long did it take you to record?

complex question. in hamburg we spent 3-4 days on it and recorded 70%. mostly everything except the vocals and some synths. the rest was around a month in ljubljana to finish it, then we mixed it for 2-3 weeks. (mod jokes about sharing there were eight versions in the openstage, kris is confused) more of trying to catch a feeling than a specific sound, that's why. it's hard to communicate that with a mixing engineer. usually it takes about that many versions before we're satisfied.

what was the thought process behind the cover art?

the photo was taken by mark pirc. the artwork seems random at this moment, i can't say much, but it will make a lot of sense.

why did you decide to remove the intro?

i've seen some people asking about this. there's the two-sided nature of playing music before it's officially released. we weren't satisfied with it on tour but it was presentable to be played live. when we got to hamburg we decided we didn't like the arrangement anymore, it wasn't in line with the vibe and spirit of the composition of the song. we toned it down and made it more sensitive because of the lyrics and mood of the song.

bojan said in warsaw that final version would have more instruments (confusion by kris that he was talking about bluza?)

i have no idea what he said, maybe he was referencing the fact that we played the pijano version of the song. but there are like at least maybe 3 or 4 layers of synthesisers and pianos so maybe he was thinking of that. all of those are credited to our "piano playing god jan". i did the guitars apart from the acoustic which is bojan's doing. nace and jure did their parts on drums and bass. the future live performances will be the new version.

who were your biggest influences getting to the final mixed version?

good question. i don't think we had one specific song in mind. we felt like it's a ex-yugoslavian evergreenish kind of song which we grew up listening to, we just wanted to keep that vibe while transitioning from an acoustic song to a complete arrangement. i think we succeeded. i know during the recording process žare said he would liken this song to a song by simple minds or talking heads or something like that, i'd have to look it up. also it kind of gives me the same feeling as when listening to a song by plavi orkestar called od rođendana do rođendana.

we saw bojan post a photo [of a notebook page] with stolica bluza while in london, what was the development process from that?

the first memory i have of the song is bojan coming into the living room and having the lyrics of the first verse and chorus already written, trying to figure out the chords. it was a well-defined song when i first heard it, i can't speak to his initial perception of the song, it came out of him very quickly, which is always a good sign. i think we all very quickly understood what the assignment was with this song so to speak. often we get a song where we want to arrange it and do it but have a lot of figuring out to do, but this song was very clear cut. it fell into place very quickly by our standards.

playing the unfinished song live was an experiment, did you like the process?

it's not the first time we've done it but it's the first time in a long time we've played unreleased songs. we did it before the first album, which was a whole different experience. it's been interesting to see it play out in this international surrounding. i think it did help, especially for šta bih ja, which immediately gained a very positive reception from the crowd and gave us a lot of confidence and direction. we knew we didn't have to change much for šta bih ja, while with bluza we kind of knew this wasn't really what we wanted from the song.

can we expect more songs similar to bluza?

uhhh... i'm sick if you can hear it. i think there will be like one more song comparable to bluza, also in serbian, a bit more slow paced, but the rest won't be that similar. there's only a limited amount of space for that type of song, we don't want to repeat ourselves. hopefully the album will sound like a unified body of work but there's still a lot of variation in it to satisfy our desire for, i don't know, experimenting with new sounds and song types and concepts.

[franstastic-ideas]

Actually, you know what the funniest thing about shipping Leaf or any of the first four gen girls is? THEY'RE ALL WAY OLDER. You'd think the biggest complaint fandom would have is going nooOOO they're ELEVEN. Except for the part where Gen 1 and 3 happen at the same time. As do Gen 2 and 4. With a three year timeskip. And then a TWELVE year timeskip. Two more; BW2 and XY happen at the same time. Add another year for Alola. Red and Blue are stated to be like. I think it was 31 in the S/M/USUM games last I checked. Leaf would be almost 10 years older than Leon (his Charmander could've been a child of Red's Charizard for all we know! I actually like to write Kantrio visiting Galar and inspiring the next gen of trainers in game-verse.) Instead I'm mostly meddling around in the anime-verse which is mostly a found-family fic so all my ships are really just joked about. Doesn't mean I haven't recycled through a ship or two as I was playing around with the fic though lol, but alas the interest wore off and I need to stick with my themes. I'm curious though, is Leaf and Green endgame for you? Also LOVE whatever you're doing including Mizuki in your Au. With the aforementioned "Kanto kids are millennials" my Leaf (game-verse) has lowkey adopted the Alola kids (with them completely unknowing she was One of The Famous Kanto Trainers From The 1996(7?) Indigo League, until Red and Blue come to Alola and hugs! reunions! tfw your mom is super friendly with your idols and your world view is flipping upside down) what's your version :D also YES shaking your hand Red and Leaf siblings trueee. out of all the protags, they look the most like twins to me. Even Hilda and Hilbert have diff eye colors, May and Brendan literally have diff parents and skin tones. Probs the only character other than Kris and Gen 2 Gold who doesn't appear as an NPC. Also, I like Thundra as a name for a Raichu! I think it fits :) laughing at you going with Kaminari as a name tho, bc I legit did the same thing with the Jolteon I give her in pre-anime fic AU (its a whole mess) or Denki (yes bnha lmao) until I saw someone spell it was "Denshi" as a nickname and thought that was cute and made it less like an obvious reference. Also considered Raijuu.

I think the funniest thing about the core series timeline topic is the fact that technically, according to several developers, there actually IS no true canon timeline.

Masuda: It starts to get a little complicated if you pay too much attention to timelines. Like, there might be a professor that appears, and it wouldn’t make sense at all if we applied that kind of timeline logic. So we try not to apply it too rigorously.

Matsumiya: Elapsed time is secret. Imagine freely!

I certainly will imagine freely, Mr. Matsumiya.

I stated this in the last ask I answered, but Sisterhood operates under a different timeline than the "canon" one. For example, the events of SwSh take place after HGSS/DPP and before SM/USUM, which takes place before B2W2/SV. BW also takes place at the same time as XY, and between FRLG/ORAS and HGSS/DPP.

I do have a visual guide, for reference.

As for Leaf and Green being endgame, I've considered Sisterhood being somewhat similar to an otome game, in the sense that the protagonists have a selection of boys they could date in a series of alternate story paths. However, for most of them there is someone who I consider their "true" love interest in Sisterhood.

For Leaf, this is Green. For Touko, this is N. For Haruka, this is Steven. For Hikari/Akari, this is Volo. And so on.

Some of the male protagonists are the sibling of the female protagonists in Sisterhood: Leaf is Red's younger twin sister, Touko is Touya's older twin sister, Gloria is Victor's younger sister by two years, and Juliana is the older twin sister of Florian. As a sidenote, Gloria and Juliana are first cousins.

Even when they normally wouldn't appear in canon if not chosen as the protagonist, every character has a role in Sisterhood somewhere. Kris is Kotone's friendly (but still tough) rival!

And speaking of Leaf's Raichu, 'Kaminari' was sort of a beta name until I found something else I liked better.

This ended up being 'Lumine'.

[unchained-lightner]

me: wow i should really have more interactions sometime-- me: me: me: me: oh. right.

[skellfamily]

A popular theory since Deltarune came out is that Deltarune is the skeleton brothers’ home universe. Sans and Papyrus seem to not originally be from the Undertale world; it’s one of the only things we are told about their backstory

I made this back in January 2017 (can’t believe it’s been 4 years!) so the implication has always been there, but many people didn’t take notice of it until Deltarune’s release. Another thing that could also go here is Riverperson’s line warning us about “the man who came from the other world”

I understand why them being from Deltarune is such a common theory. For one, Deltarune shows us an alternate universe - and the skelebros are apparently from an alternate universe. Not a huge leap to make that DR might be that place they’re from. Then you have stuff like the ‘dont forget’ drawing which shows up after Clamgirl talks about you meeting Suzy (Suzy being the UT version of Susie from DR, while ‘dont forget’ is associated with Deltarune)

However, I want to present some counterarguments to it: why I think the world presented in Deltarune might not be where Sans and Papyrus originate. This also goes hand in hand with another theory: that the Sans (and presumably Papyrus) we meet in Deltarune may have actually traveled from Undertale. so basically it’s a reversal - rather than them going from DR to UT, they’ve come from UT to DR

Let’s take a look at Sans first. There are several things about him that suggest something is up. The way he talks to Kris seems to indicate he knows more than he lets on - he winks when he says he’s never met you before, he makes a joke about how you shouldnt trust a total stranger if you answer ‘yes’ too quickly to coming over to his house, then a couple moments later asks you to hang out with his brother anyway. There’s a cheekiness to how he addresses the idea that we (ie the anomaly and him) already know each other. At the very least, he acts suspicious and seems aware that something weird is going on. It could just be his keen perception that let’s him figure it out...or maybe he really has met us before.

I also find it very strange how he insists Kris hangs out with Papyrus. why does he want a weird kid he met 20 seconds ago to befriend his brother? i feel there’s gotta be an ulterior motive there, though I’m not sure what it could be. actually, this brings me to a little theory I have: Sans doesnt tell us what his little brother’s name is. this is strange, since you’d think he’d mention something as basic as a name to the person who’s going to hang out with his brother. what if Sans doesnt say it because he knows we already know Papyrus? 

(note: some people worry that Sans not mentioning Papyrus by name means his little bro in DR isnt Papyrus. I really don’t think that will happen. Papyrus’s voice grunt is in Deltarune’s audio files; we hear the “distant trousling of bones” in the skelebros’ house; and I highly doubt Toby would tease at his future appearance, only to reveal that Papyrus has been entirely replaced by another character - that would be too cruel, even for Toby)

Then there’s ‘his’ ‘shop.’ It is Grillby’s bar. It is literally just Grillby’s bar, with the ‘Grillby’ part scratched out. even has the same flowers in the pot out front. Now you might think - oh Sans took over the building after the bar shut down! I would think that too, if not for these lines (from Fuku Fire, who is sitting in QC’s Diner)

* I like the vibe of the waitresses here. * Maybe I should sign up, too... * ... Nah, serving drinks wouldn't really suit a fire elemental. * If I got nervous, I'd just melt all the ice.

I believe this dialogue serves a specific purpose - that is, to hint at us that Grillby never owned a bar in the Deltarune verse. And when you think about it, him not having the same job would make sense since most everyone in DR has different occupations than their UT counterparts; Deltarune is a world where a lot of things are topsy-turvy after all. So if DR Grillby probably never owned a bar, that means Sans either straight up took the building from the Underground somehow, or intentionally made his shop look exactly like it (even down to including the name). Sans seemingly shows the ability to reuse his snow-covered sentry station from Snowdin all over the place in Undertale, so perhaps he can do the same thing with the bar?

Another contention I have surrounds the circumstances of the skelebros’ arrival in Hometown. apparently, they very recently moved into town. this is interesting to me for 2 reasons: first, just as in Undertale, Sans and Papyrus are not from the same place as the other monsters. the other denizens of Hometown seem to have been born and raised there; Sans and Papyrus were not. like in Undertale, where Sans and Papyrus are not from the Underground like all the rest of the monsters are, they’re from...somewhere else, retaining the outsider aspect of their UT backstory.

second, i find it awfully convenient that they rolled into town right in time for the ‘survey program’ to begin. from how Sans talks about it, it seems like they just arrived only a day or two ago. what if it’s not simply a coincidence? 

there’s also Sans’s photo album, which is part of the evidence pointing to Sans being from another universe (seen in the above image). pictures of Sans with a lot of people Frisk doesn’t recognize. people he laments he’ll never get to see again. 

the thing about Hometown, though, is that all the citizens there have Undertale equivalents. even characters who we don’t get to meet in UT should have versions existing in Undertale - we know that Susie and the Holiday family do. It would be rather odd if all these unrecognizable people who Sans misses just...live in the City or something. (it could make sense if Sans is a Darkner like some theorize, and the people in the pics are Darkners, since they presumably dont exist in UT. it’s not a bad theory, however I’m not quite convinced of it)

The final reason I think they might not from the DR verse is a meta argument. Sans and Papyrus have a lot of hanging plot threads in Undertale. their characters arent really delved into much and a large amount of the sequel hooks in Undertale connect to them (and Gaster, who is likely related to them and seems to have a major role in Deltarune). Thus, I feel it would make more narrative sense for the Sans and Papyrus we meet in Deltarune to actually be from Undertale, for the sake of their character development and so their arcs can truly be wrapped up properly.

Despite the above, I admit it’s very possible they will turn out to have come from Deltarune. or, maybe it’ll be something like the DR verse we see is based on the world they came from (if Deltarune is a simulation made by Gaster like I think it is). who knows what complicated alternate universe shenanigans could be going on with them, for all we know it could be something no one has predicted. 

[anywhozits]

Kristoff’s Favorite Christmas Present

Rating: G

Words: 4583

Verse: Canonverse

Pairing: Kristanna

Summary: Anna has a plan to give Kristoff the best present of all time. Naturally she must enlist the help of her magical sister and twin daughters.

READ ON AO3 HERE

“I’m sorry—you put the peppermint where?” Anna gasped, stopping her frantic Christmas present rearranging to stare wide-eyed at her daughter.

Two-and-a-half-year-old Iduna’s lower lip curled as she whispered, “Reindeer’s nose?”

“Reindeer…” Anna furrowed her eyebrows. “Sven’s nose?”

Iduna bobbed her head up and down, and Anna couldn’t help but laugh despite feeling mighty sorry for Sven.

“Duna!”

She shrugged. “He was hungry!”

Anna laughed again, dropping to her knees to explain calmly, “Hungry means you should put the peppermint into his mouth, not his nose. Nose is for smelling. Mouth is for eating. Let’s get this sorted out, okay? Why don’t you go with…” Anna’s eyes scanned the entire room for somebody—anybody—to lead this expedition, but they all looked more than busy.

Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Kristoff. The reminder that he was only minutes away from opening his Christmas present was enough to send an excited tingle down her spine.

Her wonderful husband had his arms full carrying their other twin, Asta, while also trying to balance Elsa’s presents. Anna could hear Asta’s adorable squeal, “Papa, papa! Booger tastes gingerbread-y!”

Anna chuckled. Oh, Asti…

For fear of spoiling everything prematurely, Anna had to look away, thus noticing that only one person—well, snowman, appeared not otherwise occupied. Smiling widely all the way, Olaf hobbled around the room, greeting everyone he saw with a wave of his twig arm and a repeated “Oh, I just love the holidays!”

“Olaf!”

“Oh, hi, Anna! Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas! Hey, can you take Iduna to find Sven? I think he might have a peppermint stuck up his nose…”

“Gotta put mouth! Sven hungry!” Iduna reached out to grab Olaf’s hand.

“Gotcha!” He said, giving Anna a wink. “Why, hello, Princess Duna. Looks like we were both on the nice list this year?” Olaf gestured to the mountains of presents under the tree. Each member of the family had a different wrapping paper color to help differentiate the gifts. Olaf’s, for instance, was blue, centrally featuring several friendly snowmen. Both Iduna and Asta, however, had already opened their presents when they woke up at the literal crack of dawn. The carnage of red and gold wrapping paper now sat in massive piles in the corner of the ballroom.

Iduna let out a high-pitched laugh. “Ya!”

As Anna watched them walk away, she let out a sigh. Still so much to prepare… and she started to feel so nervous and excited (hah—nervecited) all over again.

Her eyes drifted to Kristoff once more and then all the butterflies in her stomach unleashed themselves at once. She needed to look away. Nervecited. Yup. Still couldn’t look at Kristoff. Noted.

“Els!” Her sister, instead, provided the perfect distraction.

“Yes, Anna?” Elsa was working diligently on her ice sculptures, finishing up the last details of the ice sleigh she loved featuring as a centerpiece.

“Are you—you know what we’re gonna do? You know the plan?”

Elsa smiled. “Yep. I’ve got it.”

“Okay. Good—great.”

“You feeling all right?”

“Yes, actually. Just—”

“Nervecited?”

“Uh-huh.”

Elsa gave Anna a gentle nudge. “You don’t have to wait much longer, you know.”

And then Anna sighed. “It feels like I’ve already waited too long.”

“Why don’t we get on with it, then?”

“Okay. Yeah. Okay. That’s a good idea. Why wait anymore, right? We can… we can just go for it. Celebrate! He’ll want to celebrate, right? We’ll all celebrate?”

“Definitely!”

“Definitely, right! God, I’m so excited! Wanna grab the girls? I sent Iduna off with Olaf to find Sven and fix his nose—"

"Fix his—?"

"And once they’re back—”

“Oh! They’re here!”

Turning around, Anna saw her daughter and Olaf quickly approaching, both of them moving about in a clumsy pattern due to their collectively short legs.

“Mama!” Iduna called. “Sven love peppermint—no hungry more!” Anna giggled as she picked Duna up and snuggled her.

“Thank you for doing that, sweetie.”

“Welcome, Mama!”

“I’m happy that he loved it,” Anna said. Afterwards, Iduna tightened her hold on Anna and snuggled in close, popping her left thumb into her mouth and sucking gently. Anna kissed the top of her blonde hair.

“Shall we get started on our present for Papa?”

Iduna’s head nodded a couple times.

Okay—it was time. Nervecited. But now, way more excited than nervous.

Just one more twin to round up…

“Asti!”

She heard a little bit of a moan or a groan or maybe even an excited squeal and turned to see Asta stuffing her face with most, if not all, of the chocolate from her stocking. Her mouth was so stuffed that barely any sound could make it out.

There was also heaps and heaps of melted chocolate on her hands and her cheeks and her lips. She was a chocolate mess.

But Anna loved it. She didn’t even mind when Asti took her hand and all that melted chocolate squished between them.

“We’re gonna give Papa his present, okay?”

“Mmm!” Her mouth was still so full of chocolate.

Elsa soon joined them next to the tree, bouncing up and down in her own excitement. She took Asta’s other hand.

“Okay!” Anna shouted. “It’s time to finish opening presents!” Excited, excited! Nervous—nervecited. Excited! Anna’s mind and heart utterly couldn’t pick an emotion today. “Kris, you’re next!”

He strolled toward her with an amused smirk, kissing the twins’ foreheads before bringing in his wife for a tender smooch.

“I told you not to get me anything,” he said as he snaked an arm around her waist.

Anna laughed. “Oh, hush! You know we’d never listen to a request as ridiculous as that!”

“Besides, Kristoff, you’re gonna love it,” Elsa explained. “Right, Anna? He’s gonna love it?”

“You’re gonna love it,” Anna confirmed.

“Okay,” he said, kissing his wife yet again. “I’m intrigued.”

Anna absolutely beamed before handing Iduna over to Elsa. Elsa immediately placed her gently on the floor next to her twin. Iduna looked up at her aunt with her big cerulean eyes and kept sucking on her thumb.

The three of them—Elsa, Iduna, and Asta—then formed a circle. Elsa got on her knees, trying to remain at eye level of the two-and-a-half-year-old twins. She whispered something into both of their ears, and they smiled. Iduna freed her thumb from her mouth.

“Remember what I told you yesterday—think really, really hard about what you want to do. Picture it in your head. Concentrate… on what you want to create and how much you love your mama and your papa.”

“Auntie, too!” Asta added.

Elsa hesitated. “Oh—I… if you want to think of that, too, then—yes. You can… you can think of Auntie Elsa, too.”

“Love you!” Asta squealed, making Elsa blush.

“And I love you, too. Both of you!” Elsa booped the girls on their noses and they giggled. “Okay—are you ready?”

Both Asta and Iduna nodded and joined hands. To harness the full strength of their magic properly they needed to share it. Either they used their powers together or one relinquished the powers temporarily to the other. It’s a twin thing. And given their May Day birthday, their power must be spring themed…

Branches came to life, flowing across the room with an elegant choreography. The branches weaved together to form the shape of a wicker bassinet. The twins controlled nature—springtime nature—the earth, really. Flowers, dirt, trees, the like. The other side of Elsa’s powers.

As the girls finished their bassinet, Elsa swirled her own hands together to create the final touch—a baby made out of permafrost and ice, connected to the twins’ creation. Complete with a lovely semi-circle arrangement that allowed this piece to hang on a Christmas tree.

Ta-da, Elsa gestured. “It’s an ornament!”

“For you, baby,” Anna added as she gave her husband a slight nudge.

“Auntie Belsa! Up, please!” Iduna reached her hands out to Elsa, who happily lifted her up. Somehow, Elsa and Iduna looked more like twins than Iduna and Asta did. Truly the only key difference was that Iduna had slightly darker more-Kristoff-than-Elsa blonde hair.

Meanwhile, Asta plopped down to the floor to start licking chocolate off her hands and her face. She had more of the Kristoff genes—kind brown eyes and a fierce nose. But her face was still covered in Anna’s freckles.

“It’s beautiful,” Kristoff said. “I love that Elsa taught our daughters how to use their powers to make this.”

Anna sighed. If he hadn’t mentioned… did he really not get it? Or … was this an actually a super dumb idea akin to those first few supposedly impossible charades hints that Elsa and Olaf couldn’t get?

Kristoff gave thankful kisses to his daughters and a gracious hug to his sister-in-law. “I mean it. Elsa, you’ve clearly taught them so well. They already have such good control over their powers.”

“Well,” Elsa shrugged. “They’ve got a lot of love in their lives.”

Okay—fine. Time to push a little more. Anna urged, “Sooo, what do you think this ornament is?”

Kristoff looked at her curiously. “What?”

“Like, what’s… what’s in the ornament? What’s the theme? Who’s the baby?”

“Oh—well…it’s a nativity ornament, right?”

Both Anna and Elsa exchanged confused glances before bursting out into laughter.

“What? This is … baby Jesus, right?” Kristoff continued. “The nativity… it’s Christmas.”

Elsa buried her head in her hand and Anna groaned, clarifying, “It’s not a… it’s not a nativity ornament…”

“I can see why you’d think that, though, Kristoff,” Elsa said. “Because, well, it is Christmas. We probably should’ve given this a bit more thought.”

Anna’s heart skipped a beat. All right. Time for Plan B.

She scurried to the tree and pulled out a present wrapped in Kristoff themed red reindeer paper. “Here. This one’s from me.”

Kristoff gave it a couple hearty shakes, then he ran his hands along the creases. “Feels like a book.” Next he brought it up to his face to take a closer look. “Looks like a book.” And, finally, sniffed it. “Smells like a book.”

This was it. The present was obvious—clear. No room for misinterpretation this time.

Ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod it was about to happen.

“OPEN IT!” Anna yelled, unable to contain her excitement anymore.

He tore off the paper quickly and started smiling at a black leather notebook. “Thank you, baby. You know I love a good notebook.”

“There’s something inside, Kris!” Anna eagerly explained. “You should read it.”

Giving his wife a curious look, Kristoff opened the notebook.

The second he allowed himself to read the words written in Anna’s script, his jaw dropped.

Baby Bjorgman Number 3

Week 8: Baby’s the size of a kidney bean

-Feeling great overall! Shocker!

-Little bit of nausea when smelling onions

-Truly disgusting amount of saliva in the mouth. Need to spit every 2 seconds

-Kinda tired? Maybe? From baby or from queen things?

-Super weird, vivid dreams about Sven dancing in a tutu. Like, every night.

He was silent—in shock. When he looked up, finally, Anna beamed at him. “See, it wasn’t Baby Jesus. It was—”

Before Anna could finish the thought, she flew in the air. Kristoff lifted her up and twirled her around—his signature move.

He had done the same when she told him she was pregnant the first time, and it meant so much to Anna that he was just as excited this time around.

As Kristoff brought her back to the ground, he kept his hands around her waist and then drew her in for a tender yet passionate kiss. One of his large hands dropped to her stomach to caress her nonexistent baby bump.

“Our little bean!” He kissed her again. “This is the best Christmas present I’ve ever—and it’s even more special since you, Elsa, and the girls worked on this together. With the magic and the ornament, and, obviously, the journal you made.”

“Yay—good! I thought this would be fun! You know—since we surprised Elsa last time, I thought it only fair we return the favor. Really get you good.”

He smiled and said, “You got me real good. I had no idea, honest. I can’t say I didn’t hope but I still didn’t expect it. I take back what I said about not wanting anything for Christmas. This is what I wanted. This is everything I ever wanted.” His hand still rested protectively on Anna’s belly. “How long have you known?”

“Barely a week! I thought I was just late or stressed or something since I’ve been feeling really great, honestly. Maybe this means there’s only one baby this time?”

Kristoff laughed.

“So, you’re happy? You’re excited?”

“Of course, Anna,” he said. “This is the best Christmas present I could ever ask for.”

Tears actually shot out of Anna’s eyes. Her husband was quite literally the perfect human.

Kristoff kissed her again, and he felt it too. Honestly just as emotional as his wife. On the brink of tears. In reality, he had hoped this announcement would come soon. The doctor told them to wait until the twins were at least two before they started trying again, but on their birthday, Anna and Kristoff had decided at least was a useless phrase. Two years would be plenty.

And now, seven months later, their third kid was on the way… 8 weeks on the way already.

When Kristoff pulled away, he suddenly remembered that he and Anna weren’t alone.

“Elsa, I—thank you, again. It means… it’s so much more special now that I know.”

“You’re welcome! It’s been fun to plan. I knew you’d be thrilled.”

Kristoff smiled so genuinely his eyes crinkled. “You know me well. When did you find out?”

“She told me when I got here a few days ago. Well, she said that she thought maybe, but didn’t know for sure.”

“Once the doctor confirmed everything, we started planning this.” Anna had wanted to really surprise Kristoff this time around. She was so anxious and excited and enthusiastic the first time it was nearly impossible for her to keep anything to herself. It all started when she got that weird headache a week before her monthly cycle was due. From that point on, she told Kristoff everything, in great detail. This time, all of her thoughts, feelings, and emotions about being late but without any of her previous symptoms remained barricaded in her mind and her mind only. She really had convinced herself it was nothing more than stress. But even still, given the other-more-exciting thing was definitely a possibility, she had to keep mum. Because she really wanted to surprise him—do something special. And, conveniently, Christmas had been just around the corner.

It shocked Anna that she made it this far, honestly. A perfectly kept secret.

“And you told the twins too?”

“Yep. I told them… although not too sure how much they really understand what’s going on,” Anna laughed. They really did look as confused as ever. “But whatever—I still wanted to make sure our little cuties were involved! And Elsa kept saying that their magic lessons are going so great, too, so I wanted to see!”

Kristoff reached down and took Asta into his arms. She had wholly cleaned herself of the chocolate. Sugar-high very much imminent.

“Asti, you’re gonna be a big sister! How does it feel?”

“I have sister!”

They all laughed.

“You do have a sister. You have Iduna. But this summer—uh, when exactly did they say?”

“Mid-July, probably. Maybe late July. Maybe early August,” Anna responded. “Toss-up between Cancer and Leo baby!”

“Ooh right. That’ll be interesting,” Elsa said. “Honeymaren said she wanted to help me with a full astrological reading whenever you have your next baby. We’ll have some thinking to do before this summer.”

Anna legitimately squealed. “Aww, that’s nice of her! How fun! I love your readings, Els.”

“Thanks.”

“So, wait. Anna, you’re really feeling okay?” Kristoff sounded stunned. Granted, he had to watch her throw up everything she put into her mouth (other than chocolate) for the first almost 15 weeks of her last pregnancy, so his shock was more than founded.

“Uh-huh! It’s super weird. Disorienting, honestly. I can eat real food and not have to worry about tossing it back up later. Although now that I said that I bet it’ll all change and I’m gonna have to throw up all the—ugh, I’m totally jinxing it, aren’t I?”

“Nah, honey. There’s no such thing as a jinx.”

“You’re talking to someone who has a fifth spirit sister, a talking snowman best pal, and also twin daughters with special earthy springtime nature powers,” Anna deadpanned, so much so that Kristoff chuckled. “There are totally such things as jinxes, husband. Totally, totally.”

She was probably right on that one.

“Well I know you’re—ah, guess I shouldn’t say that, with the jinx and everything—but, um, even though you’re—” Kristoff gestured and made noises that sounded like he completed the phrase with ‘feeling great’ without actually saying the words. “But, what would you say if I started up my chocolate collection again?”

“Um, well, obviously I would say the only thing I can say which is… bring it on, baby! I’d love some chocolate. Chocolate sounds amazing right now. Honestly I was about to lick it all off of Asta’s hands until she licked it off herself.”

This got Asti’s attention. “More chocolate?”

“Chocolate for Mama this time! And maybe we’ll save some for you, too, soon-to-be-big-sister.” Anna said while giving Asti’s blonde hair a good ruffle.

In the meantime, Kristoff’s eyes darted quickly to the hutch in the corner of the expansive ballroom and he eyeballed the collection of silverware, trying to locate his favorite chocolate-making spoons. He couldn’t help but note the fact that one of the spoons is distractedly off-kilter. He smirked. “Asti, wanna come with me to get some chocolate, love?”

“Mmhmm!”

And then they were off.

Anna looked around curiously for a second before turning back to Elsa. “Wait, wait, wait, wait. Where did Olaf run off to? Was he even here when Kristoff figured it out?”

“I have no idea.”

“Duna, have you seen Olaf?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Olaf!” Anna called out. “Olaf, are you here? Are you anywhere?”

Nothing.

But then, soon enough, they heard the pitter patter of snowman feet on the wood floors. “I’m coming, I’m coming, I’m coming!” He was going as fast as he can, holding onto an extremely shoddily wrapped present.

He stopped in his tracks, right in front of Anna, took a bow, and then held up the present to her face. “This one’s for you! And Kristoff!”

“Oh! Thank you, Olaf,” Anna said, taking the present into her hands. “When’d you run off?”

“After you gave Kristoff his gift.”

“Oh—so you—”

“Anna! Chocolate!”

Anna snapped to attention when a bar of sea salt dark chocolate barrels toward her face. She caught it with her left hand thanks to some kind of crazy reflex she didn’t even know she had. “Thank you, husband!”

When she gave Kristoff a gracious look, she noticed that Asta was sucking on some more chocolate. All right. Super, super crazy sugar-rush now even more imminent.

Olaf skipped toward Kristoff. “I have a present for you!”

“Oh, uh—”

“I’ve got it here, Kris,” Anna explained, holding up said present.

“Great!”

Kristoff put Asta down and stood next to his wife, helping her tear open the present. Upon removing the crumpled wrapping paper, a marvelous creation revealed itself.

Adorable blue knit booties. Baby-sized.

Both Anna and Kristoff’s eyes widened to a saucer-like degree. Kristoff started, “Olaf, how did you—”

At the same time that Anna added, “Did you make these yourself?”

“Yup! Made them yesterday—oh boy was I excited when I overheard you and Elsa talking about the new baby! And now I know that babies come from eating a special pie thingie from the trolls, and that they start off really tiny inside you and then they’re born after a really, really long time. And when they’re born, they have little feet that could get cold! So yes, I made these,” Olaf said proudly. “And by the way, I did such a great job keeping the secret—but it was so hard. I told so many rocks and trees and snowballs in the forest. And a couple fish. Oh, and maybe twelve puffins!”

“Those puffins. Surprised they didn’t come blabbing,” Anna joked, giggling. “Well, thank you, Olaf. These are adorable and it’s so sweet that you worked so hard to make them! Baby’s gonna love them. You’re right, they’ll be perfect for keeping baby’s little teeny tiny feet so nice and warm. But, wait… since when do you know how to knit?”

“Just something I’ve picked up with my old age.”

Kristoff raised his eyebrows. “Old age, huh?”

Entertaining Kristoff zero, Olaf narrowed his eyes and waddled closer to Anna. “So the baby’s still really tiny, right?”

“Yes! You could tell if the baby were bigger. Remember last time the babies grew a lot before they were born?”

“Oh, yes, I do remember,” Olaf said. “It looked like you ate Sven!”

Laughs all around.

Then, Asta toddled on over to her snowman best friend. “Play, play with Olaf!”

“I would love to play with you, Princess Asti!”

Iduna started squirming in Elsa’s arms, signaling that she, too, wanted to play. Elsa set her down carefully and Iduna’s legs propelled her toward Olaf at warp speed.

“Hello again, Princess Duna.”

“Olaf!” She ran to give him a hug. “Play!”

“Why, yes, I’d love to play with you too! This is so much fun—playing with the twin big sisters! What should we play?”

Asta started, “Ring around rosie!”

And Iduna chimed in at practically the same time, “Olaf says!”

“Hmm. Both wonderful games! And I bet we have time for both. What should we start with?”

“Ring around the rosie!”

“Olaf says!”

“Huh. A stalemate. How can we solve this? A dance off?”

The girls giggled.

“Or can I choose the order?”

They both stared blankly at Olaf.

“Ring around the rosie first! Sorry, Iduna. We’ll play Olaf says next, okay? And I’ll make it extra special just for you, future-big-sister.”

Asta jumped in the air and ran around in probably twenty circles in excitement. The chocolate evidently hit Asti right at that second.

Eventually, they positioned themselves for game time in the middle of the ballroom, leaving Kristoff, Elsa, and Anna alone by the tree.

Kristoff took this as his opportunity to cozy up to his wife. He usually wouldn’t do this in such a public space. As much as he loved physical touch and affection, he was never one for PDA in the usual sense of the term. But something about today felt different. Something about this whole wonderful and exciting situation felt different.

Immediately he dropped to his knees, and then two large hands grabbed Anna’s still-small waist. First, he ran one hand along her stomach, and then he planted gentle kisses on the place that would grow over the next seven months.

Anna giggled and blushed. She always loved when he did this. It made her feel even a pang of regret that she worked so hard to keep the possible pregnancy a secret. Because she missed out on four weeks of this…

But seeing his wide, surprised, ecstatic eyes… and witnessing their daughters working to make this surprise present happen made it all the worth it. They’d still have time for this. Now, even—now was the perfect time.

And it was, clearly. Kristoff felt it, too. He cooed, “Tiny bean baby. Not Sven sized—bean sized. I love you, baby bean. Papa loves you.” His voice got pretty high-pitched and sing-songy when he spoke.

Of course, Elsa heard from Anna that Kristoff tended to speak a little differently around her—their cutesy nicknames only one example. But witnessing it firsthand made Elsa smile a smile unparalleled in sincerity.

Bringing in Olaf’s booties close to her heart, Anna blushed in pure delight, cherishing them as much as she cherished the moment.

Kristoff continued making faces at Anna’s stomach, putting his ear against it, and speaking in high-pitched whispers.

This visual was far too cute for Elsa and she felt the emotions getting ready to pour out of her.

“I’m so happy for you two! Really—I said this all to Anna the other day—with tears and everything, but you’ve both been so wonderful to Duna and Asti, and it’s clear to me, given how they already have such a good grasp on their powers. I guess I did have control somewhat when I was younger, but then it got worse, when, uh—” She hesitated but then cleared her throat. Not wanting to go down that road tonight. “But you two. You’re really doing well. You’re great parents. You’re meant to be parents.”

This made Kristoff stop what he was doing and run to give Elsa a nice, big hug. “Thank you.”

“Yeah, Els,” Anna agreed, walking over to put one loving hand on Elsa’s shoulder. “That means a lot to us. Like, a lot a lot. We were just two fools who knew a lot about being alone. And almost nothing about childrearing.”

“Your heart’s so big, though. You… you always had it in you. Both of you.”

Anna laughed and Kristoff hugged Elsa tighter. PDA-mode very much activated. “Hope this’ll hold true once we’re outnumbered.”

“You won’t be outnumbered,” Elsa explained. “You’ve still got Auntie Belsa.”

Anna automatically felt tears welling up in her eyes. One cute little line from her sister and she was off to the crying races yet again. “Thank goodness—we’re so lucky to have you.” Okay, it had gotten worse. Anna was practically a hyperventilating mess of tears at this point. Barely able to get out the sentence without a sob in between each word.

Then they heard a chorus of rambunctious squeals from the twins and an enthusiastic yelp from Olaf. Their attention focused on the middle of the room.

They gasped.

Iduna and Asta had created floating roses that hang above their heads as they play the game, and each of the three held their own bouquet of roses in their hands.

When Elsa said they had good control of their powers, Anna didn’t quite think she meant this. Without Elsa’s coaching, even.

They watched as the roses swelled in time with their singing

Ring around the rosie

A pocket full of posies

“Posies!” Asti yelled. “In pocket!”

With two swirls of her hand, posies appeared. Both Asta and Iduna stuffed them into their dresses. Olaf positioned a couple on his head. The girls laughed at that sight.

Seeing this, Anna sighed, lovingly and longingly. “They’re perfect.”

“And another perfect one’s on the way.” Kristoff smiled and rubbed her belly one more time for good measure.

“Wow,” Anna gushed. “Next year there’ll be three.”

“Outnumbered,” Kristoff added.

But Elsa huffed. “Not outnumbered!”

“I can’t wait!” Anna squealed.

And she couldn’t. They all couldn’t.

Because this Christmas was absolutely everything they could've wished and hoped for. And naturally, all their future Christmases, complete with a gaggle of three or four or five-hundred Bjorgman children, would be just as perfect.

With its open gates, full hearts, and an even fuller castle.

[andhumanslovedstories]

Recent country songs that have made me literally gay gasp as a gay woman, in order of how much they make me want to write an essay on gender and queerness

HONORARY MENTION BUT JUST BECAUSE I THINK THIS IS TECHNICALLY AMERICANA NOT COUNTRY (but genre is fake) AND THIS SONG ISN’T RECENT (2014 and I’ve been listening to it faithfully since then) BUT I ONLY RECENTLY LEARNED IT’S A COVER AND THAT’S MADE ME RECONTEXTUALIZE IT: “Murder in the City” by Brandi Carlile, a cover of The Avett Brothers where she changed the words “make sure my sister knows I loved her/make sure my mother knows the same” to “make sure my wife knows that I love her/make sure my daughter knows the same” which fucking. fucking gets me. Especially since the first time that I heard this song, I assumed it was from a man’s point of view because of that line, and then I learned that Brandi Carlile is a lesbian and I was caught up in my foolish heteronormitivity, and then I learned it was a cover and thought oh okay I guess the song is originally from a man’s pov and it’s cool she covered, and then I learned she changed those lines to make a song that already feels deeply personal to her to explicitly include her love for a woman and the family they’ve made together. And that’s just. It’s all just a lot. 

3) “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” by Miranda Lambert featuring Maren Morris, Elle King, Ashley McBryde, Tenille Townes and Caylee Hammack, because the first time it came up on my spotify, I saw the title and was like “hey dope I like this song” and then I heard the first line was still “I must have been through about a million girls” and I realized none of the words or pronouns were getting changed and I was getting the song I’ve always wanted and deserved: a high production value, high energy, big girl group tribute to being a lesbian fuckboy who Fooled Around And, oops can you believe it, Fell in Love. 

2) “If She Ever Leaves Me” by The Highwomen, sung by Brandi Carlile who is, as mentioned, lesbian, but since I’m apparently still chugging my comp het juice, I was still trying to figure out if this song--a classic “hey buddy keep walking, she’s my girl and she’s not interested” song with an interesting element of the singer being aware the relationship might not last anyway--was gonna be explicitly queer. And then there’s the line, “That's too much cologne, she likes perfume,” and I was like OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! 

This is immediately followed by the lines “I’ve loved her in secret/I’ve loved her out loud” which is also deliciously queer in this context, with this singer and that juxtaposition, but the line that really fucking got me is my favorite of the song: “If she ever leaves, it's gonna be for a woman with more time.” This is two women in a complicated relationship. This isn’t just a “keep walking, cowboy” song, it’s a song that uses that framework to suggest a whole ass “Finishing the Hat”** relationship, and that’s so interesting to me. Like a song that isn’t just explicitly about two women in love but one that conveys very quickly a rich history between the two of them. And in a genre where the line “Kiss lots of boys, kiss lots of girls if that’s something you’re into” was revolutionary representation.

(Fun fact, “Follow Your Arrow” was partially written by Brandy Clarke, another country lesbian! Another fun fact, so is basically every other good country song. Brandy Clark, please write a big lesbian country anthem, I know it will immediately kill me on impact.) 

To quote one youtube comment, “”lesbians how we feeling??” and to answer by quoting some others, “As a closeted baby gay in the 90s, who was into country, this song would have changed my life”, “I just teared up.  So many happy tears, as a gay woman raised on country music,  this is something that's definitely been needed.  Thank you Brandi. Thank you highwomen”, “This song means more than I can say in a youtube comment”, and “Lesbians needed this song :)”

It’s me. I’m lesbians. 

**ANOTHER HONORARY MENTION EXCEPT IT ISN’T RECENT AND IT ISN’T COUNTRY SO I GUESS THIS IS JUST A MENTION, BUT I AM INTERESTED IN THIS SONG--“Finishing the Hat” by Kelli O’Hara. A very good Sondheim joint, that’s about making art, the costs of its obsessive and exclusive nature and the incomparable pleasure of putting something into the world that wasn’t there before. It’s such a traditionally male narrative that I’m thrilled to find a wonderful female cover of it. I’m not even fussed about her changing the gender from the lover who won’t wait for the artist (except that the shift from “woman” to “one man” sounds so clunky) because there’s value turning this song into a lament of the men who won’t love artistic women. But I do also wish she’d also recorded a version that kept the original gender so it would be gay. OKAY BROADWAY TANGENT OVER, BACK TO COUNTRY. 

1) “Highwomen” by The Highwomen, ft. Yola and Sheryl Crow. I can’t even express the full body chills the first time I heard this. Like repeated, multiple chills renewed at every verse of the song. This really closely parallels my experience with “Fooled Around and Fell in Love” up there, because when I started it I was like “oh dope I know what this cover will be” and then the lyrics started and I was like “OH MY GOD I DIDN’T.” In the case of “Fooled Around” it’s because I was amazed that they kept the original words. In the case of “Highwomen” I fucking transcended because they changed them. 

So I grew up on Johnny Cash, obsessed with a couple of his albums but largely with a CD I had of his greatest hits. (Ask me how many times I listened to the shoeshine boy song. Hundreds. Johnny Cash told me to get rhythm and I got it.) And my FAVORITE was “Highwayman” from the country supergroup he was in, The Highwaymen. The concept of the song is that each of the four men sing a verse about a man from the past and how he died. It’s very good. The line “They buried me in that grey tomb that knows no sound” used to scare the shit out of me. I didn’t expect to have a song that targets so specifically my fear of being buried alive in wet concrete. 

(If you haven’t heard the song, by the way, listen to this version to properly appreciate it as a piece of music. If you have, watch the fucking music video holy shit this is a work of art oh my GOD.) 

So I was predisposed to love this cover before I even heard it. But then I heard it. And they rewrote the song to be about historical women. And it’s like. There’s layers here okay. 

Neither the Highwaymen nor the Highwomen are signing about famous people. This isn’t a Great Man tour of history, it’s about dam builders and sailors and preachers and mothers and Freedom Riders and also Johnny Cash who flies a starship across the universe, as you do. 

In the 1986 version, it’s a song about the continuity of life--the repeated idea is “I am still alive, I’m still here, I come back again and again in different forms.” The highwayman is all the men in the song. He reincarnates. The song is past, present, future. The title is singular, masculine. The same soul, expressed through multiple voices, multiple lives. 

In the 2019 version, the title is plural, feminine. Highwomen. This song is about women. Each verse asserts the same motif as the 1986 version--“I may not have survived but I am still alive”--but there is no implication of reincarnation. Each woman is her own woman. This version has a final verse that the previous versions lacks. The singers harmonize. It’s not a song where one voice replaces  another, the story of this One Man progressing through time. It ends in a chorus of women saying “We are still alive.” 

We are The Highwomen Singing stories still untold We carry the sons you can only hold We are the daughters of the silent generations You sent our hearts to die alone in foreign nations They may return to us as tiny drops of rain But we will still remain

And we'll come back again and again and again And again and again We'll come back again and again and again And again and again 

Another fun fact! The first time I heard them sing “We are the daughters of the silent generations” I died! But luckily I came back again and again and again.  

This is a song about the continuity of history. It asserts that women’s historical lives matter and that they continue to matter, long after they died. This is a song about legacy as well, the legacy of nameless women who worked to protect the ones they loved and make the world better. They don’t die by chance. They are all hunted down by political violence, by racism, by misogyny, for stepping outside their prescribed roles. But, as Yola (who btw fucking CRUSHES THE VOCALS ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????? HOLY SHIT MA’AM) sings as a murdered Freedom Rider, she’d take that ride again. And at the end of the song, she joins the chorus but does not disappear into it. Her voice rises up out of crowd. And the crowd calls itself “we”. These women are united but not subsumed into being One Woman. This is about Women. 

And then, outside the song itself, there’s the history of this song about history. It’s originally by Jimmy Webb and was covered by Glenn Campbell. This cover inspired the name of the supergroup that covered it, the group with Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, Waylon Jennings, and my man Johnny Cash. And it’s like holy shit! What an amazing group to collaborate! Hot damn! 

Then, it’s 2019 and here’s The Highwomen with Brandi Carlile, Natalie Hemby, Maren Morris, and Amanda Shires. The name is obviously riffing on The Highwaymen. Shires set out to form the group in direct response to the lack of female country artists on the radio and at festivals. And they name themselves after a country supergroup, and they put out this song, a song connected to massive names in country music, and they center all of this on women and womanhood and the right of women to be counted in history and to make history and to talk about the ways we have mistreated and marginalized women, in a group that started because one woman was like hey! we’re mistreating and marginalizing women! 

I just think this is neat! I think there’s a lot here we could unpack! But this post is 100 times longer than I was planning and work starts in a bit so uh I’m gonna go get dressed and listen to The Highwomen on repeat for the next hour, “Heaven is a Honky Tonk” is another fucking bop that improves on the original, it would be dope if they’d collab with Rhiannon Giddens, okay byyyyyyyye 

[stratuscloudsurfer]

Champion Stadium Hard Level 1 Strategy Guide

Ok, since I had fits with the champion stadium (especially round 3), and I’m hard pressed to find any strategy for it yet, I’m going to share the exact teams and order I used to finally attain victory, in hopes of helping someone else do the same.

WARNING LONG POST UNDER THE CUT

Round 1: (Parameter: Use status conditions and other conditions against all opponents!) Lorelei

So, Leaf was basically tailor made for this battle against Lorelei. Use razor leaf turn 1, and all three opponents will most likely get badly poised. From there, I set up Mega Healing and used Dawn to buff defense, freeing Brendan up to do his thing. Lorelei’s team went down pretty quickly, mostly thanks to the massive amount of poison damage. 

I think other sync pairs that would work well during Round 1 are Koga, Lyra, or Rosa. In hindsight, I wish I had used Lyra or Rosa in lieu of Dawn, as the extra healing she provided was altogether unnecessary due to how fast my opponents went down to poison damage and Sceptile’s leaf storm. 

Also, I know that the game recommends you take out the two pokemon on the sides first, but I went into this round without reading the tips, and took out Lapras first. I’m not sure how much of a difference it would make to take out the other two first, but taking out the center mon first worked out for me in this round. 

Round 2: (Parameter: Use sync moves quickly against all opponents!) Bruno

Sygna suit Blue came in SUPER clutch this battle. His move “To the Top!” was super useful in accelerating the move gauge for Kris’s Mega Kick. I used one at the beginning, and the second one when the first one ran out. Hilbert, of course, is an ideal support for Kris. His attack and speed boosts get rid of the need for Kris to waste any turns using her attack boosts, freeing her up to straight up attack right off the bat. 

As for strategy, mine was basically to spam Mega Kick over and over again. Again, I focused on taking down the center mon first. One recommendation I have is to use Blue’s sync move on your first opportunity. This activates Force Field 4, which will give your team a Sp. Def buff, as well as the Safety Net. The fact that Blue and Hilbert could survive one more attack meant that the opponent’s pokemon had other targets to get through before they could take out Kris. I truly believe this ability got me the W in the end. 

I think other sync pairs that would work well for this parameter might be Siebold and Clawitzer paired with Winona and any other support that could boost special attack. If you don’t have Hilbert but do have Kris, Maylene would be a great support for her, as well. 

Round 3: (Make use of special damage reductions to battle opponents with high Sp. Atk!) Lance

Round three was, hands down, the hardest one for me. I spent AGES trying to take down Lance with all kinds of different combinations of sync pairs. It was especially frustrating because the opposing Lance’s Dragonite was practically indestructible with its Clearheaded ability, which prevented the confusion it otherwise would have hit itself in probably a thousand times due to spamming Outrage over and over. 

I tried for a long time to use Lyra in lieu of MC and Torchic, as I wanted to save her for Blue, but I had no other choice. MC’s “Blazing Hope!” was absolutely necessary to boost the power of Lance’s Hyper Beam. My strategy was to use both “Blazing Hope”s and Drake’s Special Defense boosts at the very beginning of the battle as quickly as possible, then fire off Hyper Beams at the pokemon on either sides. I at first tried to take out the center mon first like in the previous battles, but this time, it was impossible to win any other way than to take out the side mons first. 

I burned up MC’s two attack boosts to get down to my Lance’s first sync move, and used Drake’s “Hard to Starboard!” just before the opposing Lance could use his sync move, which is helpful because it had the additional effect of charging up the move gauge and allowing my Lance to fire off more Hyper Beams. I used Lance’s potions to heal up MC’s Torchic and keep it alive as long as possible. I saved both “Now or Never!”s until the very end of the battle, then used them both in between two Hyper Beams that delivered the final blow to the opposing Lance’s extremely infuriating Dragonite. 

All this being said, I think I probably battled Lance a good 50 times before I got the W. Other combinations I tried was swapping Zinnia for Lance and Maylene for MC, but neither of those worked very well, I think due to the lack of healing capability. I think Zinnia could be useful in this battle if you had the Clearheaded ability unlocked as a lucky skill and a support sync pair that had healing capability, such as Dawn or Skyla. Additionally, I had to fully unlock Drake’s type skills, and my MC’s potential was boosted up to 4 1/2 stars. 

Round 4: (Parameter: Use sync moves as much as possible against all opponents!) Agatha

I actually tried versing Agatha in Round 3 Acerola, Fantina, and Pheobe, but found it to be even more impossible than Lance on the 3rd round, which is why I decided to save her for last. 

Elesa was definitely the MVP of this battle. I took a look at her sync grid and unlocked it to the point that I could get the MP refresh for “Breathtaking!” and it was a game changer. I used up both of her Special Attack boosts and Acerola’s Defense boosts the beginning of the battle, then targeted the side mons first with Fantina’s Shadow Ball. I used up Acerola’s “Over Here!” right before Agatha’s Gengar could use it’s sync move, which would allow Elesa’s Rotom to stay alive and continue using “Breathtaking!” to get down to Fantina’s sync move continuously. I waited until Gengar was the only pokemon left to use Fantina’s two “Dance with Me!”s so that I could fire off the two Shadow Balls that delivered the death blow. 

If you don’t have Fantina, I think that Shauntal would be an excellent swap in for her. In place of Elesa, Rosa or Cheren would probably be good support mons, especially with Cheren’s full heal to get rid of the self-inflicted burn that would probably take Shauntal out fairly quickly otherwise. I’m sure Morty would be good as well, but I can’t speak for him because I don’t have him. I highly recommend Acerola as at least one of your allies for this team, though, as her type skills were super helpful fully unlocked. 

Round 5: (Parameters: Use physical attacks against opponents with low defense! / Use status conditions and other conditions against all opponents!) Blue

I hated to be so cliche as to use Red against Blue, but... well, he’s obscenely strong, so I had to do it to him. This was the exact team I used. I chose the status effects condition with Flannery in mind, and let me tell you, it was the right decision. I actually intended to level all of these guys up to max before I challenged Blue, but I ran completely out of level up materials, and so decided just to go ahead and challenge him to get a feel for how the battle would be. I didn’t expect to win on the first try, but this team brought me to a solid and swift victory. 

Skyla is an ideal partner for Red because her “Take Flight!”s negate the massive drop in both defenses that Charizard incurs after using “My Destiny!” My strategy in this battle was to use both “My Destiny!”s and “Take Flight!”s at the very beginning of the battle, then to burn Blue’s Exeggutor with Will-O-Wisp immediately after the status boosts. I unlocked Skyla’s sync grid enough to get the MP refresh for Potion, which was super duper helpful. I think it refreshed a good 5 times, allowing me to heal her up to survive all the attacks directed at her, as well as her two allies after Blue’s sync move had been used. With Red, I spammed Heat Wave before and after his sync move until both side mons went down, then used a couple of Blast Burns to take down Blue’s Exeggutor. 

Other sync pairs that I think have potential for this battle are Flint in lieu of Red and Blaine in lieu of Flannery. Of course, MC and Torchic would be a great support for this battle, as well. 

And there you have it! Now of course, I’m not a Pokemon Masters expert, or am in any way claiming to be. I just hoped that my struggle could perhaps help someone else out with this challenge. Also, if anyone else has beat the Champion Stadium with other sync pairs, I would love to hear what you used! 

[aideyn]

(Comprehensive?) RWBY OC Creation Guide

(this is a fan-made guide of things that I hope people will find helpful when creating RWBY-verse OCs.)

(Guide taken from Monty Oum's twitter account. Click to embiggen.)

(Tips from Starexorcist. Click to go to original!)

CHARACTER INSPIRATION

A good majority of the characters have strong ties to other fictional figures of note. Not a necessity, but something that could really strengthen your OC if you take the time to plan it out. 

Red Riding Hood, Goldie Locks, Snow White, and Beauty; Thor, Achilles, Mulan and Joan of Arc; the Velveteen Rabbit, Sun Wukong and Glinda the Good Witch are all examples of confirmed /or fandom favorites for canon character inspiration points. (As of writing this, Aladdin is a fan favorite for Emerald's inspiration point.) So, fables, folklore, and myth are all great places to start!

Note that it is usually the aesthetics of the story more than plot particulars of their story that the RWBY characters take from these inspiration points.

COLORS

Name that Color All 120 Crayon Colors 20,000 Names.com, Color Names

EMBLEM

The emblem is pretty straight forward, just remember that all of the characters have it incorporated onto their costumes! Something with simple lines/silhouettes that communicates the gist of your character.

AURA

Each character has an Aura which protects them and basically makes sure that they can take a beating without dying, which is important in any action heavy world. They also take the form of a color. Pyrrha's being red, Jaune's being white, and Ren's being pink. These have been seen being used defensively, as shields, offensively, as a energy burst, for healing, and to unlock another person's Aura. 

It has been proposed by fans that using Aura offensively and defensively can be draining, to explain why Ren, shown to be a great fighter against the double headed snake, collapsed after the battle with the scorpion. Not canon fact, but something to consider when creating your character.

SEMBLANCE

A character's semblance takes the form of a unique ability, and does not appear to be linked with Aura. Pyrrha's semblance takes on a black color, different than her Aura. And others do not have a distinctive color when they use their semblance. There might be room for an overlapping of semblances, as Weiss's semblance is described as Glyphs, and those seem very similar to Glynda Goodwitch's style of fighting.

Use the already elaborated upon semblances to compare the power of your semblance to ones that are canon, if you think your OC's semblance might be overpowered, it probably is, and should probably be tuned down so that it avoids being a character's insta-win button.

WEAPONS

Note that a lot of the canon weapons are in fact a weapon other than a gun, with a gun adaptation. This is common but not a rule. Not all the weapons, but enough to get you started!

Swords: Short, Long, Bastard, Broad, Claymore, Rapier, Scimitar, Sabre, Chinese Dao, Roman Gladius, Katana, Pistol Sword, Falchion, Tiger Hook Sword, Saber, Kukri, Machete, Cutlass

Axe: Halberd, Poleaxe, Throwing Axes, Battle Axe,

Daggers: Throwing Knives, Kris, Stilletto

Close Range: Tiger Claws, Brass Knuckles, Bladed Cestus, Katar (Fist Blade/Push Dagger), War Fan, Gauntlet

Blunt: Mace, Morningstar, Heavy/Dire Flail, Club, Quarterstaff

Others: Trident, Spear, Javelin, Guisarme, Naginata/Glaive, Ranseur, Scythe, Cat'o'Nine Tails, Whip

Ranged: Long Bow, Short Bow, Crossbow, Boomarang, Blowgun, Chain-and-Dagger

 Shields: Heater, Round, Wankel, Buckler, Celtic, Kite, Oval, War Door

[absolutelaw-blog]

PROFILE ; KRISTOPH GAVIN.

GENERAL.

full name.  kristoph gavin.  pronunciation.  kris-toff gah-vin.  nicknames.  the coolest defense in the west. the coolest killer in the west. kris. (   caution on this one  :  if you call him this and your name isn’t klavier gavin, he’ll go above & beyond to make you miserable. he’ll tolerate it from his brother, but no one else   ) . height. 6′1″-6′2″.  age.  32 years old (   in canon  ;  age is verse dependent.   ) . zodiac. capricorn. languages. german (   mother tongue   )  ;  english (   learned pretty much concurrently with german, and so he’s about equally fluent   )  ;  japanese (   passable. living in aa-universe california necessitates knowing at least a little   ) .

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS.

hair colour.  platinum blonde.  eye colour.  grey-blue. skin tone.  pale, freckles easily.  body type.  lean. he’s tall & broad-shouldered enough to be intimidating if he’s trying, but outside of that, he’s not very physically imposing. he is, apparently, strong enough to kill a man with a wine bottle in one hit, though, so i guess he has to have something of a swing.  accent.  pleasantly transatlantic, tinging on somewhat british. it’s how he learned english, and while he could have easily adopted an american accent after living in california for such a long time, he insists on ‘ speaking properly. ’ (   he’s pretentious.   ) he usually does not speak with a noticeable german accent -- but when stressed, upset, angry, frustrated, flustered, or otherwise not as in-control of his emotions as he usually is, the accent will slip out. he despises this. dominant hand.  right hand. posture.  confident, almost regal. shoulders back, hands clasped behind his back or arms crossed in front of him, chin up, looking down his glasses at you. there may be no crown on his head, but that won’t stop him from holding himself like he’s a king.  scars.  one, along the back of his right hand. can, in the right light, take on the appearance of a rather horrid face when he twitches his hand. despite its peculiar qualities, he doesn’t think about it much anymore. he got it as a child  ;  it’s been there so long it’s no longer notable to him.  tattoos.  none. he thinks they’re rather distasteful.  most noticeable features.  height, long hair, self-assured posture, eyes hidden behind glasses, that scar. 

CHILDHOOD.

place of birth.  berlin, germany.  hometown.   los angeles, california.  birth weight / height.  – manner of birth.  . . . the usual one ? first words.  his parents used to joke that his first word was ‘ cross-examination. ’ this, of course, was only after he got into themis legal, and proved he could be an asset to the family name. kristoph always sort of resented it. and so, he’s not actually ashamed to say his first words were the usual ones. ‘ mama, ’ ‘ papa, ’ ‘ puppy. ’ that sort of thing.  siblings.  klavier gavin (   younger brother   ) .  parents.  oskar gavin (   father   )  ;  emilie gavin (   mother   ) .  parental involvement.  oskar and emilie were minor political figures in germany  ;  they had children more as attempts to maintain a family-friendly image in the face of mounting scandals than they did out of any actual, genuine interest in raising said children. as such, kristoph (   and later, klavier   ) was pretty much handed off to a series of nannies & otherwise left to his own devices. his parents’ actual involvement in raising him was . . . minimal. they died in an accident while he was completing his junior year of college. he played the part of the grieving son perfectly well, but he wasn’t really all that aggrieved about it. (   he always sort of wondered if the accident was an accident or if it was some political move, but to investigate that, he’d have to actually care about what happened to them.   ) 

ADULT LIFE

occupation.  defense attorney.  current residence.  a rather posh high-rise apartment building in los angeles. a rather posh solitary confinement cell.  close friends.  why, his dear friend phoenix wright, of course !  (   hah.   )  partners.  what, legal partners ?  uh, he’s got a student -- oh, you mean romantic partners ?  ugh. pass.  relationship status.  single. not looking. (   verse dependent.   )  financial status.  let’s just say he’s in a very comfortable income bracket. (   --- & how did he get there so fast, what with his parents losing most of their fortune to constant legal battles, leaving him to make money himself ?  best not to ask.   )  driver’s license.  yes. he doesn’t like to drive, though. he’s more the ‘ hire a driver ’ type.  criminal record.  prior to the events of apollo justice ?  clean as clean can be. too clean. suspiciously clean. after ?  one count of evidence forgery, two counts of first-degree murder, one count of attempted murder -- and that’s only what we know of. 

SEX & ROMANCE.

sexual orientation.  bisexual / demisexual. maybe a slight preference for men, but functionally, it doesn’t matter -- he’s very, very demisexual, and it’s extremely rare that he’s actually genuinely attracted to someone. nine out of ten times, if he sleeps with someone, it’s going to have been because doing so conferred some kind of material advantage on him -- i.e., they had something he wanted.  romantic orientation.  biromantic / demiromantic. again, though, it tends not to matter, because it’s so incredibly rare that he feels real attraction of any kind towards someone. if kristoph is romancing you, it usually means he wants something from you.  preferred emotional role.  Submissive | Dominant | Switch |  Unsure preferred sexual role.  Submissive  |  Dominant |  Switch |  Sex repulsed libido. low. unless he actually likes you. then about average ?  turn ons.  if i answer this question, my kristoph muse will physically manifest IN my home and poison me with atroquinine, killing me within fifteen minutes of ingestion. turn offs.  unless he actually likes you, don’t try to make him be genuinely emotionally vulnerable with you. ugh. disgusting.  love language.  in the very rare case he actually likes you, he appreciates them all. however, he especially likes acts of service. he knows better than anyone else that pretty words are often lies  ;  actually going out of your way to assist him with something isn’t so surface-level to him, and is deeply appreciated.  relationship tendencies.  generally, he thinks they’re a waste of time & a potentially dangerous vulnerability. to be avoided. 

MISCELLANEOUS.

character’s theme song(s). i know i put my go-tos (   where i want to be from chess & choke by idkhw   ) on the last meme that asked a question like this, so i’m gonna try to go for some different ones  :  severed by the decemberists (   gonna leave you all severed   ) & nice day by the romanovs (   nice day for a murder !   )  hobbies to pass the time. playing the violin (   & occasionally writing a piece or two   ) , cooking, keeping journals, reading, taking walks (  ��usually with his dog   ) , shopping (   shush.   ) . mental illnesses. none that are formally diagnosed. he clearly has quite a number of problems going on in that head of his, but he would define them less as problems and more as strengths, so it’s not like he’d seek help.  physical illnesses.  other than being blind as a bat without his glasses, he’s physically healthy.  left or right brained.  left brained.  fears.  nothing at all. failure. being forgotten. being wrong. that he isn’t the best, always & at everything. IT’S OVER, KRISTOPH. YOU’RE NOT NEEDED ANYMORE.  self confidence level.  unreasonably high. you could say he has a bit of a god complex.  vulnerabilities. his academic intelligence and logic may be above & beyond that of your average person, but he never matured emotionally, so he still has the emotional intelligence of a child. his solution to fearing that he might not be perfect was to repress it until he had five black psyche-locks, for god’s sake. and it was his hatred of wright that blinded him to the idea that phoenix might formulate a plan that could stop him -- he saw wright as a naive idiot because of that hatred, and as such underestimated him. his inability to process or even acknowledge his own emotions means that he has no way of telling when his analyses are objective and when they’re tainted by how he feels about them, and his arrogance means he’s convinced they’re all accurate. so, sometimes, no matter how accurate his formula is otherwise, he forgets to factor in emotion -- and he miscalculates. 

Tagged by: @smoulderingsilver (   aaaahhh thank you so much !!   )  Tagging: again, anyone who wants to do this, consider yourself Tagged By Me. 

[thesinglesjukebox]

THE BAND PERRY - THE GOOD LIFE

[4.92]

"Good" may be a stretch for some, but controversial is not!

Ian Mathers: "You know, when I asked how things were going since the divorce, I didn't actually need this level of specificity. Also it's weird that your brothers are here." [3]

Thomas Inskeep: What the fuck happened?!? The Band Perry's last album, their 2013 sophomore effort Pioneer, is a sublime, Rick Rubin-helmed country record. And now apparently they want to be, what? Chainsmokers? Actually, this isn't even that good; it sounds more like a Paris Hilton record. I'm embarrassed for them just listening to this. [1]

Katie Gill: You've got to give The Band Perry some props. If they kept putting out songs along their earlier sound, more music like "Chainsaw" or "If I Died Young," they would probably still have halfway decent airplay on CMT. Instead, whether it's due to a musical evolution or (what I'd put my money on) blatant trend chasing, The Band Perry refuse to be limited by their best known sound. That being said, holy shit this song is grating, obnoxious, and downright immature at points. [3]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: "Glad I never had your baby / This will be a cleaner cut / You can keep the labradors": three lines so simple, so cutting, so savage, that while stationary biking at the gym, I literally had to stop pedaling, clutch my pearls, and whisper "Oh my god" when I listened to this for the first time. I shouldn't quote the whole song line by line, so here's another highlight that deserves special mention: "I don't wanna still be friends / I just wanna break your neck." No words minced here, just the most systematic takedown of a cheating bastard since "Sorry" or "Before He Cheats," made even more thrilling because of how unexpected it is coming from The Band Perry. [7]

David Moore: The Band Perry does the reverse Lil Nas X and takes their big dark energy to the hip-hop charts...ten years ago. But hey, I loved 808s and Heartbreak, and Kanye never wrote a line as ice cold as "you can keep the Labradors." Damn, dude, she doesn't even care about the dogs anymore, you must have really fucked up! [7]

Joshua Lu: Even despite the colossal genre difference, this song reminds me of how in the chorus of "If I Die Young," The Band Perry progressively got more ridiculous with every line, with requests of satin, some roses, a sunrise, and then a love song. In "The Good Life," they similarly don't know where to stop their wonky details, except instead of romantic imagery, they utilize awkward slang ("bro" is barely tolerable; "hoes" isn't at all) and clumsy statements ("You can keep the labradors/"). There are some passably impactful lines, like "This'll be a cleaner cut," but they're vastly outnumbered by those edgy stinkers, and it's all drowning in a goopy Weeknd-lite backdrop. [2]

Katherine St Asaph: Those invested in The Band Perry's country career likely see this as a trend-chasing outrage -- at least "Old Town Road" mentioned a tractor! Fortunately, I am not invested in their country career, and can thus recognize this as one of the best pop singles of 2019. You can too: Pretend it's the new Kelly Clarkson single, which it basically is, plus Kanye's "Heartless." (Kris Allen strummed so The Band Perry could burble.) The only country remnants are the specificity in the first verse, but unlike crossover patient zero "The Middle," "The Good Life" isn't remotely shiny. Nor is it remotely chill, nor really conversant with the pop zeitgeist. (The bridge, with its lone spotlight synth, kiiinda resembles something Max Martin might write, but five years ago, and only if you stretch.) Instead, the level of bitterness equals Natalie Imbruglia's "Want" and maybe even approaches Tori's "Blood Roses" (that second verse comes awfully close). [9]

Alfred Soto: Grant them this: if "The Good Life" is Nashville, I'm Squeaky Fromme. "I just wanna break your neck," Kimberly Perry coos over a wobbly electrobass backdrop. Too outre for Nashville, perhaps, not outre enough for contemporary pop, where wobbliness is the coin of the realm. [5]

Michael Hong: So The Band Perry are releasing "edgy" Spotify-core synth-pop now, huh? While the whole thing has the distinct markings of a club track, it simply feels lifeless because the vocals, coated in their hazy atmosphere, only dull the pulsing synth. That lifelessness creeps into their lyrics, and The Band Perry's attempt at something devastating with the line "you gave it up for hoes" never really registers because of it. [2]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Coordinates indicated that The Band Perry were aiming for new musical territories, but "The Good Life" is the song they needed to justify the change. The new sonic direction and dramatic synthwork help sell the disgust in the lyrics: the revulsion of prior physical intimacy, the remorseless desire to snap necks, the relief that she never bore children with this dude. That the lyrics are analogous to things we often hear in country music only makes them feel more caustic, like the severity of ill-will that Kimberly harbors is fully unveiled in a way that couldn't in country pop radio. The vocal delivery is clunky at times, but it's honestly these moments of awkwardness that sell the song--after all, how often are post-break up diatribes flawlessly executed? The 808s & Heartbreak-indebted bridge is a fun bit of worthwhile, borrowed empowerment. The "Good Life" that Kimberly's seeking, though, is a bit different than what Kanye ever talked about; she wants retribution, and it's palpable. [7]

Edward Okulicz: When I close my mind and pretend this is a new single by, like, The Veronicas, I love it, because it's like a perfect even more bitter follow up to their "Think of Me." But it's still great as a new single by The Recording Entity Perry too. The jagged edges of the music aren't revolutionary, but they provide something of a distorted mirror to reflect the ugly twistedness of the vocals and the story. To me, the overall effect is that of impotent rage against an indifferent target, which makes it more relatable than is comfortable. [8]

Joshua Copperman: It's not as bad as contemporary Little Big Town's horrible pop crossover, but it's really weird. Despite the intent, Kim Perry says 'hoes' like a 12 year-old cursing, and the "damn good rhyme/line" lyrics would be okay if there were more damn good rhymes/lines in the song. (There are some good lyrics, but they're scattered and don't rhyme - "Sick I ever touched your body/Sick you ever tasted mine" is one such oasis.) The titular line doesn't work as a hook. The distorted 808s don't work as the beat either. Nothing coheres whatsoever, but there are enough interesting elements to make this listenable, if only as a curio. [5]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[daggcrisms]

Rules for mobile users

[[here’s a google doc for the updated list of rules, applicable for all my blogs]]

anything under this cut is from my outdated rules.

[rules updated: 07/28/2019]

–STUFF YOU SHOULD DO–

• No godmodding. No sending (implied or explicit) homophobic/transphobic/bigoted messages to me or my character either.

• Please don’t over-pester me for replies. I promise I’ll get to them. Feel free to drop me a reminder after at least a week of no replies, though. In return, I usually give you a week too, unless otherwise specified in your own rules, until I remind you if it’s your turn to reply (or more often, I chicken out and trust that you’ll eventually respond/want to drop it and end up never bringing up that particular thread ever again). You’re always free to start multiple threads with me, that is greatly encouraged because I love having lots of threads with people.

• If you start getting bored with the roleplay, feel free to drop it and/or end it. We can always start up another thread in the future.

• However, please let me know if you want to drop a roleplay thread! It can give me major anxiety when I’m waiting for a response that’s never going to come, and I wonder if I did something wrong and assume that’s why you’re not replying anymore :’) I’m not forcing you to let me know if you want to drop a thread, you can drop it without saying anything too. But I personally really appreciate being told about that sort of thing.

• Don’t reblog a thread you’re not part of. This should go without being said, of course. Personals will be hardblocked immediately, rp blogs will receive a warning.

• If you can trim your threads, please do! It’s fine if you can’t, though, because I will most likely trim the thread for you. If you don’t trim threads with other people, however, I’ll be less likely to follow you since I don’t like scrolling through long posts.

• Please don’t claim any of my art as your own. If you post it somewhere, the least you can do is credit me by at least including a link to my blog or something. Bonus points if you ask me first before reposting my art, but I understand if you’re anxious because so am I :’)

• If any of your art is featured on my blog, as an icon or something and you don’t want me to use your art, please tell me!!! Message me privately or contact me in some way and please let me know that you want your art taken down. As a fellow artist, I understand wanting other people to not use your art (although I am personally fine with it as long as proper credit is given,) but if you’re more strict about it than I am, that’s totally okay too! Just let me know, and I’ll stop using your art immediately, will delete all icons I have of your art, as well as delete every single instance of your art being used on this blog.

• That being said, if you’re following me, please let me know if I’m doing something that’s making you uncomfortable or is breaking one of your rules!! I do read the rules pages of everyone, but I’m human and forget things, and I’m not a mind reader either ;~; I care, so please tell me if I’m ever doing anything bad

• You can reply to any of my open starters at any time! Even if they’re a year old! Even if other people have already replied to it! My open starters are open for a reason, and we don’t have to be mutuals for you to reply to them either :’)

—

–STUFF YOU SHOULD KEEP IN MIND–

• I am of age to do smut, but Kris is a minor so that is a no for this blog! There will occasionally be sex jokes, but that’s about it. No explicit smut in this house.

• This blog is not a spoiler-free one. I will not tag roleplays with spoilers, but anything else will be tagged with Deltarune Spoilers

• I’m alright with roleplaying nsfw in general, minus smut. Gore, violence, and generally dark roleplays are cool with me. I love angsty things just as much as I love fluff ;w; Speaking of gore, you’re more than welcome to fight/harm/injure my muse to any extent! You don’t even have to ask! Come in and fight this gremlin tbh! If you want to do a rp where they die, however, please dm me first.

• I prefer not to roleplay with personals, unless you are someone I know from school or something like that. Personals in general are allowed to follow me too!  However! Personals are not allowed to reblog roleplays, in character posts, or ooc posts especially if I say in the tags that I’m going to delete the post later. Only things that are tagged with my “online reblogs” or “musings” or "art tag" tags are okay to reblog. Headcanon posts are not okay to reblog unless I say otherwise.

• Like spamming is okay! I very occasionally lose roleplays, and getting lots of notes from likes are never a factor for that, for me personally. If I lose a roleplay, it’s mostly just because I forgot, so that’s really a “me” thing. I’m usually very good at keeping track of who I’m roleplaying with and how many ongoing threads I have, and I reply pretty consistently, so just remind me if I haven’t responded after five or more days (as stated in one of the above rules)! And I like it when people like my posts! It lets me know that you like my blog and the stuff I post, and it makes me happy :’)

• If you are an OC, I will assume our muses have never met unless you plan ahead with me what their relationship is like.

• That being said, characters who have already interacted in canon will know each other. Unless the roleplay takes place in a different point of time and we are staging their first meeting, of course.

• Kris will be pretty meta sometimes. They are aware of who Players are (they're definitely not fond of them other than the few good players they've met), and they know they live in the game world, and are aware of alternate universes and things of that nature.

• Kris is nonbinary on this blog. Although, I don’t care if you refer to them as a boy or a girl (Kris personally will care if you refer to them as a girl though, because they usually Don’t like that). Their order of preference for pronouns is they/he/she, although they will definitely like you more if you use exclusively they/them pronouns. I respect all headcanons about Kris’ gender, and same goes for any Frisks and Charas. If you play a KFC kid, gendered or not, I will use the pronouns they want used, and I do hope that you use they/them pronouns for my Kris. I personally will default to using they/them for other Krises, Frisks, and Charas unless specified on your blog. No discourse about this, please. 

• Doubles are welcome to interact too! Of course they are, considering the Kris Squad. I’m also cool with interacting with and following multiple blogs who portray the same character other than Krises as well!

• This blog will not have mains. However, the only “main” they really have is the Berdly over at @berdbrainx. That Berdly originates in their timeline in the “main verse.” Other than him, they will not have any specific version of a muse that they’ll talk about in threads, unless the thread is specifically about that one muse for some reason. For Deltarune non-Kris blogs, they will typically be the Kris in your universe unless you already have a Kris main or you talk about it with me beforehand. Doubles of Kris will be treated as alternates. In their “main verse” in spontaneous roleplays/asks/replies to in-character posts (online roleplays), they reside in their own separate timeline. It’s a classic timeline that doesn’t have any other muses in it, so they don’t have a specific blog’s Susie, or Noelle, or other character that is from their own timeline. So they will treat your muse as if they are an alternate of their own timeline’s counterpart of them.

• I’m pretty lenient with short replies. Don’t feel pressured to match the length if my reply gets long! Multi-para (usually 2-5 paragraphs) is my go-to for roleplays, so I usually do long replies by default.

• Adding onto that, I honestly don’t mind one-liners. Of course, in crack/online roleplays it’s fine but I’m okay with it in serious roleplays too. I prefer it if you don’t give me one-liners, but hey, as long as I’m still having fun with the roleplay anyway, it’s cool with me! I understand not being able to think of anything to write, so just as long as you don’t give me one or two words as your reply like ‘He smiled.’ or ’*laughs*’, I’ll be cool with it. Put at least some effort even if you’re only gonna give me one sentence, otherwise I’ll drop the rp once it becomes a repeat offense.

• I will not change the formatting of my roleplays to fit yours. I’m comfortable with sticking to only paragraph style roleplays, thank you very much. Feel free to keep formatting your own posts though, because I think formatting looks really cool! I just don’t want to format my posts, however. I will not go all out with formatting my own posts with all that cool ‘small text’, and indents, and bolding and all that. The most I ever do with my formatting is italics for emphasis on certain words, and using icons.

• I tend to move roleplays from asks onto its own post. If I send you an ask meme and you answer it, I'll respond by making a new post, tagging you, and linking to your reply. Until formatting on asks are fixed, I will answer any asks sent to me in a new text post rather than asks.

• I accept any sort of asks! If they aren’t answered after a while, either I don’t know how to answer it or I might be drawing it out and I am a very slow artist- Sorry-

• Feel free to tag me in any of those tagging memes! I don’t mind and I think they’re pretty fun to do! ^^

• Adding onto the above rule, you’re more than welcome to send me those chain asks like “send this to 10 roleplayers you think are really great!” because it’s super duper nice that you would think to send one to me! But don’t expect me to send them to other people, because I won’t :’) my anxiety won’t let me, so I’m sorry-

• If I follow you, that means I’ve already read all of your rules. I might not send the codephrase, though, because most of the time I get very anxious over having to send things like that. I’m very sorry–! But if I follow you then chances are that I have definitely read them before following- If you choose not to trust me on this, I understand.

• I generally follow every rp blog that follows me, but I might not follow some people back for a few reasons. Some might be for the type of content you post on your blog, but I am still non-selective! I will roleplay with anyone who asks (unless you wanna rp gross things or you’re a mean person,,,, like your muse can be as much of a dick as you want, that’s no problem but don’t be gross to other people as yourself) and if I do roleplay with you, I will be more likely to follow you as well.

• Adding onto the above rule, however, please respect that it’s nothing personal if I ever unfollow you either! It’s not that I hate you or anything, but if you haven’t followed me back and you’re a private rp blog, or if we’re mutuals but never really roleplay, our muses just don’t click, you spam stuff that I don’t want to see on my dash, or you’ve become inactive for years and/or don’t interact with me anymore, there’s nothing wrong with that! We can still be friends but I prefer to have all the people I follow be potential rp partners. Feel free to follow me on my personal, @briightskies, if you still wanna keep in touch but not rp :’)

—

–ABOUT THIS BLOG–

• This blog is OC, multiverse, and crossover friendly! I love OCs and have many of my own tbh, you’re all more than welcome to come rp with me!!

• I’ll also rp with fandoms I’m not into either, as long as you have a good about section for your character, which also indicates how you portray them (any headcanons or AUs you have that aren’t canon, or whether you portray them as canonly as possible, unless they’re OCs of course since a regular about page is a given) and I’ll probably look up other things about that fandom in its wiki if I don’t know what something is anyway.

• This blog is multiship! So any relationships my muse is involved in, are in different timelines unless specified. Poly relationships aren’t bad though, just saying. I ship pretty much anything unless it’s incest or if they’re children paired with someone a lot older. Selfcest is fine too. Because Kris is a minor, they won’t really get intimate with their partners, but romantic stuff is a-okay.

• I also only ship with chemistry. My muses need to get to know yours first, so don’t get disappointed if they only see you as a friend/acquaintance at first and has no intention of pursuing a romantic relationship with your muse. Give my muse reasons to care about your muse and let the feelings develop naturally, and don’t ever force your muse on mine. Unless it’s to mess with them, or whatever other reason. Unrequited stuff is absolutely okay with me too!

• I will tag common triggers and such, but don’t be afraid to tell me if you have something you want me to tag! I promise I’ll remember to tag it from then on. I do not have any known triggers myself. Any trigger warning tags will be written as “tw; ____” with a semi-colon, not a colon. If I feel like something should be tagged as a trigger but I’m not sure what to tag it exactly, I’ll just tag it as “tw” as a sort of catch-all tag.

|     Requested tagged triggers:

tw; gore

tw; contagious diseases

tw; self harm

tw; child abuse

tw; spiders

tw; blood

tw; homestuck

tw; fnaf

tw; drugs

tw; smoking

tw; alcohol

tw; needles

• I will only talk through the IM system ooc. If you send me a message through there, I will not respond with ooc brackets ((these things)) because I will automatically assume you know that you’re talking to the mun. I do not do roleplays on there.

-

Thank you for reading this really long list of rules! It means a lot if you did!

There’s no password, because I’m also anxious with those for other people’s blogs as I said above. But if you would like to interact with me, you can shoot me an ask directed to my muse, or like one of my starter call posts at any time (also feel free to re-like those posts so I can make another starter for you at any time!) for me to write you a starter!

[berdbrainx]

Rules for mobile users

[[here’s a google doc for the updated list of rules, applicable for all my blogs]]

anything under this cut is from my outdated rules.

[rules updated: 08/14/2019]

–STUFF YOU SHOULD DO–

• No godmodding. No sending (implied or explicit) homophobic/transphobic/bigoted messages to me or my character either.

• Please don’t over-pester me for replies. I promise I’ll get to them. Feel free to drop me a reminder after at least a week of no replies, though. In return, I usually give you a week too, unless otherwise specified in your own rules, until I remind you if it’s your turn to reply (or more often, I chicken out and trust that you’ll eventually respond/want to drop it and end up never bringing up that particular thread ever again). You’re always free to start multiple threads with me, that is greatly encouraged because I love having lots of threads with people.

• If you start getting bored with the roleplay, feel free to drop it and/or end it. We can always start up another thread in the future.

• However, please let me know if you want to drop a roleplay thread! It can give me major anxiety when I’m waiting for a response that’s never going to come, and I wonder if I did something wrong and assume that’s why you’re not replying anymore :’) I’m not forcing you to let me know if you want to drop a thread, you can drop it without saying anything too. But I personally really appreciate being told about that sort of thing.

• Don’t reblog a thread you’re not part of. This should go without being said, of course. Personals will be hardblocked immediately, rp blogs will receive a warning.

• If you can trim your threads, please do! It's fine if you can't, though, because I will most likely trim the thread for you. If you don't trim threads with other people, however, I'll be less likely to follow you since I don't like scrolling through long posts.

• Please don’t claim any of my art as your own. If you post it somewhere, the least you can do is credit me by at least including a link to my blog or something. Bonus points if you ask me first before reposting my art, but I understand if you’re anxious because so am I :’)

• If any of your art is featured on my blog, as an icon or something and you don’t want me to use your art, please tell me!!! Message me privately or contact me in some way and please let me know that you want your art taken down. As a fellow artist, I understand wanting other people to not use your art (although I am personally fine with it as long as proper credit is given,) but if you’re more strict about it than I am, that’s totally okay too! Just let me know, and I’ll stop using your art immediately, will delete all icons I have of your art, as well as delete every single instance of your art being used on this blog.

• That being said, if you’re following me, please let me know if I’m doing something that’s making you uncomfortable or is breaking one of your rules!! I do read the rules pages of everyone, but I’m human and forget things, and I’m not a mind reader either ;~; I care, so please tell me if I’m ever doing anything bad

• You can reply to any of my open starters at any time! Even if they’re a year old! Even if other people have already replied to it! My open starters are open for a reason, and we don’t have to be mutuals for you to reply to them either :’)

—

–STUFF YOU SHOULD KEEP IN MIND–

• I am of age to do smut, but Berdly is a minor so that is a no for this blog! There will occasionally be sex jokes, but that’s about it. No explicit smut in this house.

• This blog is not a spoiler-free one. I will not tag roleplays with spoilers, but anything else will be tagged with Deltarune Spoilers

• I’m alright with roleplaying nsfw in general, minus smut. Gore, violence, and generally dark roleplays are cool with me. I love angsty things just as much as I love fluff ;w; Speaking of gore, you’re more than welcome to fight/harm/injure my muse to any extent! You don’t even have to ask! Come in and fuckin deck Berdly in the face, I approve greatly!! If you want to do a rp where he dies, however, please dm me first.

• I prefer not to roleplay with personals, unless you are someone I know from school or something like that. Personals in general are allowed to follow me too!  However! Personals are not allowed to reblog roleplays, in character posts, or ooc posts especially if I say in the tags that I'm going to delete the post later. Only things that are tagged with my "musings" or "art tag" tags are okay to reblog. Headcanon posts are not okay to reblog unless I say otherwise.

• Like spamming is okay! I very occasionally lose roleplays, and getting lots of notes from likes are never a factor for that, for me personally. If I lose a roleplay, it’s mostly just because I forgot, so that’s really a “me” thing. I’m usually very good at keeping track of who I’m roleplaying with and how many ongoing threads I have, and I reply pretty consistently, so just remind me if I haven’t responded after five or more days (as stated in one of the above rules)! And I like it when people like my posts! It lets me know that you like my blog and the stuff I post, and it makes me happy :’)

• If you are an OC, I will assume our muses have never met unless you plan ahead with me what their relationship is like.

• That being said, characters who have already interacted in canon will know each other. Unless the roleplay takes place in a different point of time and we are staging their first meeting, of course.

• Doubles are welcome to interact too! Although currently I don’t know of much other Berdly roleplay blogs lmao. I’m also cool with interacting with and following multiple blogs who portray the same character! Such as the Kris squad.

• This blog will not have mains. Other than the Kris at @daggcrisms. That Kris originates in his timeline in the "main verse". Excluding them, he will not have any specific version of a muse that he’ll talk about in threads, unless the thread is specifically about that one muse for some reason. For Deltarune blogs, he will typically be the Berdly in your muse’s timeline in serious roleplays, unless your muse is part of an AU/UA/canon-divergent universe, or there are things about your muse’s backstory that would contradict Berdly being in your timeline naturally (like Berdly being dead or something), or you talk about it with me beforehand. In his “main verse” in spontaneous roleplays/asks/replies to in-character posts, he resides in his own separate timeline. It’s a classic timeline that doesn’t have any other muses in it, so he doesn’t have a specific blog’s Susie, or Noelle, that is from his own timeline. Only Sponte/Kris from the blog mentioned above.

• I’m pretty lenient with short replies. Don’t feel pressured to match the length if my reply gets long! Multi-para (usually 2-5 paragraphs) is my go-to for roleplays, so I usually do long replies by default.

• Adding onto that, I honestly don’t mind one-liners. Of course, in crack/online roleplays it's fine but I'm okay with it in serious roleplays too. I prefer it if you don’t give me one-liners, but hey, as long as I’m still having fun with the roleplay anyway, it’s cool with me! I understand not being able to think of anything to write, so just as long as you don’t give me one or two words as your reply like ‘He smiled.’ or ’*laughs*’, I’ll be cool with it. Put at least some effort even if you’re only gonna give me one sentence, otherwise I’ll drop the rp once it becomes a repeat offense.

• I will not change the formatting of my roleplays to fit yours. I’m comfortable with sticking to only paragraph style roleplays, thank you very much. Feel free to keep formatting your own posts though, because I think formatting looks really cool! I just don’t want to format my posts, however. I will not go all out with formatting my own posts with all that cool ‘small text’, and indents, and bolding and all that. The most I ever do with my formatting is italics for emphasis on certain words, and using icons.

• I tend to move roleplays from asks onto its own post. If I send you an ask meme and you answer it, I'll respond by making a new post, tagging you, and linking to your reply. Until formatting on asks are fixed, I will answer any asks sent to me in a new text post rather than asks.

• I accept any sort of asks! If they aren’t answered after a while, either I don’t know how to answer it or I might be drawing it out and I am a very slow artist- Sorry-

• Feel free to tag me in any of those tagging memes! I don’t mind and I think they’re pretty fun to do! ^^

• Adding onto the above rule, you’re more than welcome to send me those chain asks like “send this to 10 roleplayers you think are really great!” because it’s super duper nice that you would think to send one to me! But don’t expect me to send them to other people, because I won’t :’) my anxiety won’t let me, so I’m sorry-

• If I follow you, that means I’ve already read all of your rules. I might not send the codephrase, though, because most of the time I get very anxious over having to send things like that. I’m very sorry–! But if I follow you then chances are that I have definitely read them before following- If you choose not to trust me on this, I understand.

• I generally follow every rp blog that follows me, but I might not follow some people back for a few reasons. Some might be for the type of content you post on your blog, but I am still non-selective! I will roleplay with anyone who asks (unless you wanna rp gross things or you’re a mean person,,,, like your muse can be as much of a dick as you want, that’s no problem but don’t be gross to other people as yourself) and if I do roleplay with you, I will be more likely to follow you as well.

• Adding onto the above rule, however, please respect that it’s nothing personal if I ever unfollow you either! It’s not that I hate you or anything, but if you haven’t followed me back and you’re a private rp blog, or if we’re mutuals but never really roleplay, our muses just don’t click, you spam stuff that I don’t want to see on my dash, or you’ve become inactive for years and/or don’t interact with me anymore, there’s nothing wrong with that! We can still be friends but I prefer to have all the people I follow be potential rp partners. Feel free to follow me on my personal, Briightskies, if you still wanna keep in touch but not rp :’)

—

–ABOUT THIS BLOG–

• This blog is OC, multiverse, and crossover friendly! I love OCs and have many of my own tbh, you’re all more than welcome to come rp with me!!

• I’ll also rp with fandoms I’m not into either, as long as you have a good about section for your character, which also indicates how you portray them (any headcanons or AUs you have that aren’t canon, or whether you portray them as canonly as possible, unless they’re OCs of course since a regular about page is a given) and I’ll probably look up other things about that fandom in its wiki if I don’t know what something is anyway.

• This blog is multiship! So any relationships my muse is involved in, are in different timelines unless specified. Poly relationships aren’t bad though, just saying. I ship pretty much anything unless it’s incest or if they’re children paired with someone a lot older. Selfcest is fine too (though I really don’t know how to feel about Berdly x Berdly,,,,,, I mean, if you want to try it with me, go for it lol!). Because Berdly is a minor, he won’t really get intimate with his partners, but romantic stuff is a-okay.

• I also only ship with chemistry. My muses need to get to know yours first, so don’t get disappointed if he only sees you as a friend/acquaintance at first and has no intention of pursuing a romantic relationship with your muse. Give my muse reasons to care about your muse and let the feelings develop naturally, and don’t ever force your muse on mine. Unless it’s to mess with him, or whatever other reason. Unrequited stuff is absolutely okay with me too!

• I will tag common triggers and such, but don’t be afraid to tell me if you have something you want me to tag! I promise I’ll remember to tag it from then on. I do not have any known triggers myself. Any trigger warning tags will be written as “tw; ____” with a semi-colon, not a colon.

|     Requested tagged triggers:

tw; gore

tw; spiders

tw; insects

tw; blood

tw; homestuck

tw; smoking

tw; drugs

tw; alcohol

tw; needles

tw; oceans

tw; cutting

duplicates // (if anyone else has a specific way they want something tagged that's different from my tagging style, please let me know)

tw; zombies

tw; bats

tw; maggots

tw; sibling death

tw; sibling peril

• I will only talk through the IM system ooc. If you send me a message through there, I will not respond with ooc brackets ((these things)) because I will automatically assume you know that you’re talking to the mun. I do not do roleplays on there.

-

Thank you for reading this really long list of rules! It means a lot if you did!

There’s no password, because I’m also anxious with those for other people’s blogs as I said above. But if you would like to interact with me, you can shoot me an ask directed to my muse, or like one of my starter call posts at any time (also feel free to re-like those posts so I can make another starter for you at any time!) for me to write you a starter!

[jefferyryanlong]

Fresh Listen - John Trudell, AKA Grafitti Man (Rykodisc, 1992)

(Some pieces of recorded music operate more like organisms than records. They live, they breathe, they reproduce. Fresh Listen is a periodic review of recently and not so recently released albums that crawl among us like radioactive spiders, gifting us with superpowers from their stingers.)

I approached John Trudellʻs 1986 cassette tape (re-released as a CD in 1992) AKA Grafitti Man with two significant biases. First, I have a strong distaste for the music recording technology of the period. Sonic engineers, with their updated machines, had the newfound ability to scrape the rust away from their records, smoothing and glossing the edges and sucking the space from an aural document so effectively that it came across as compressed and sterile as a snow globe. You listen to these mid/late-Eighties mainstream records and they extend through time and the imagination like brittle branches of plastic, all the living energy–the breath, the ring, the rattle, the bleeding, the overload–constricted out of the husk of a clearly articulated but dead idea. 

Second, aside from just a few exceptions, Iʻm skeptical of spoken word performances awkwardly conjoined with a musical context. Iʻve been disappointed too many times. Though a poetʻs words might resonate on a page, or upon the naked template of air, the same words sometimes fall dead against a drum or a guitar. Conversely, Bob Dylanʻs words may seem leaden and overblown in a book, but as a performer, he has the ability to empower the nasal delivery of his thought-dreams with a rhythmic electricity. Many people might tell you different, but songwriting  and poetry are not always complementary disciplines, and evoke different reactions within the gut and the soul. Experiments in marrying the two are sometimes excruciating as an experience.

On AKA Grafitti Man, John Trudell seems to have discovered a working formula for combining his poems with pop music. He builds his pieces around ear-clinging choruses, hooks that echo in the mind long after the more complicated parts are forgotten. Though less direct than what listeners are used to hearing on their pop music records, these are real songs, grown-up songs. Songs of regret and resentment, of protest and celebration. Trudell honors the traditions of rock, blues, country, and old-timey ballads and contours his poems around those forms, instead of the other way around. 

(If youʻve read this far and are wondering who the hell John Trudell is, I encourage to look him up on whatever media you have at hand. His personal story is more compelling, and important, than AKA Grafitti Man, though the record itself is a refraction of Trudellʻs past as a veteran in the US Armed Forces, Native American activist and spokesperson, and rogue DJ who, with a group of like-minded free radicals, snuck into Alcatraz and set up a radio station. A big thanks to Rodney Morales for turning me on to Trudellʻs music.)

Fortunately for the listener, Trudell has kindred-spirit helpmates to assist him in crystallizing his vision on the album. Jackson Browne served as Executive Producer–I thought I could hear his vocals on one or two of the choruses. I noted the lead guitar early on, a wonderfully peculiar tone, whether played as slide, blues, or straight-up rock, a tone that consciously avoids cliche blues regurgitations. Turns out the axman is Jesse Ed Davis. When you hear AKA Grafitti Man, youʻre not only getting a great John Trudell record, youʻre also getting a pretty damn good Jesse Ed Davis record. 

AKA Grafitti Man begins, as several of the songs do, with a Native American vocal, this first appearance against silence; a brief, vaguely familiar string of notes abruptly overtaken by a drum fill and a mid tempo rock groove. Trudell, claiming the expression of his people, infuses this expression with his own aesthetics, heavily influenced by Elvis, Bo Diddley and Chuck Berry, all the while calling back to Native American music. “Rocking the Res” contrasts indigenous ways of relating to natural phenomena and natural people with false commitments perpetuated by a decadent, commercialized reality in which war and consumerism are enmeshed, each dependent on the other. “A weird kind of living,” Trudell calls it, finding comfort in the soft-spoken resistance with which his people have denied the dominant American consumer/political message.

The characterization of the shaman has long been over-generalized and dissipated by American popular culture. In AKA Grafitti Manʻs title track, Trudell repurposes the essential function of the shaman–to tell a truth that no one of the tribe has the courage or foresight to tell–and applies it to a street artist, who uses their medium to illuminate the order of the world to a benighted populace. The Grafitti Man of the song is not of the upper class but of the people, is not cut off from the viscous mess and fecundity of life by fancy clothes and money. The Grafitti Man is able to accurately portray the reality of class in the United States because they are most acutely a victim of it. “Down with bosses,” the Grafitti Man writes, identifying authority as a meaningless layer that separates us from the rough texture of real life.

In “Restless Situations,” Trudell moves into RʻnʻB territory (neatly offset by Native America percussion between the soul groove), female backup singers doing the emotional work of communicating Trudellʻs empathetic portrayal of a woman swimming against confusion and insecurity.  In “Wildfires,” the poetʻs normally cool delivery builds toward impassioned (though still controlled) intensity, his words landing like notes against Davisʻs steady guitar and the organ of some unidentified hero. Here, Trudell is less a poet with a backing band and more a part of the band itself. The technique with which he carefully drops each phrase just behind the beat displays the skill of a true musician. “The nature of fire is to burn, every spark gets its turn,” the vocalist (not Trudell) melodically yells between the verses, commenting on the whims and notions that make up an identity. Some of these sparks lead to conflagrations inside and out, while some fizzle and die, and all we have is this residual smoke that ambiguously defines ourselves and our actions. Trudellʻs “wildfire” is interior–the wildfire is whatʻs released upon our loved ones and our hated ones, that makes us who we are. 

Itʻs the keyboardist who elevates “Baby Boom Che” to something near a masterpiece, folding in tuneful references to Elvis hits (especially “Love Me Tender”) in between the turnarounds. For Trudell, Elvis Presley, whom Trudell claims not only for Native Americans, or White Americans, but for all Americans, was a liberating spirit that exploded the haunted, post-war piety of Fifties USA with sex and dancing a a new consciousness in which the drab alternatives proffered by mainstream USA were no longer sufficient. “I mean, you take ʻDonʻt Be Cruel,ʻ ʻI Want You, I Need You, I Love You,ʻ and ʻJailhouse Rockʻ or you take Pat (Boone) in his white bucks, singing ʻLove Letters in the Sand,ʻ I mean hell man, what’s real here?” Elvis is not simply an entertainer–he is a revolutionary in the most political sense (whether he had any awareness of this aspect of his popularity), laying the groundwork for a new way to understand bodies and minds that had been dulled for so long by the psychopathic pall laid upon young America by two world wars.

I should note here that Trudellʻs words, and the ideas he conveys through those words, are far more complex and concern so many more areas of thought than can be described here. A full examination of “Baby Boom Che” would require more than a blog post. It would require a thesis, if not a full dissertation. 

The two most musically ambitious songs on Trudellʻs album are the similarly themed “Bombs Over Baghdad,” a prescient outspeak of inevitable events that were to unfurl several years after this album was recorded,  and “Rich Manʻs War,” which condemns the tendency of nation-states to callously sacrifice human potential for material and commercial resources. Where “Bombs Over Baghdad” rocks with a chunky electric guitar and furious leads alongside a mournful war cry, “Rich Manʻs War” is a swampy, synth-driven groove imbued with a heartbeat by Native percussion and intermittent chanting.

“Never Never Blues,” bookended by outlaw country songs “Somebodyʻs Kid” and “What Heʻd Done,” is a straightforward throwaway intensified by a group of female singers, another lament on the failures in relations between man and woman. It sounds like Kris Kristofferson helping sing the chorus of “Somebodyʻs Kid” (a credit sheet for AKA Grafitti Man has been difficult tracking down over the Internet), and Iʻd say it could very well be Mavis Staples showing up for some emotive lines in “What Heʻd Done.”

Jesse Ed Davisʻs soulful slide guitar and a heartbreaking chant provide visceral support to“Beauty in a Fade,” where, in his deadpan rendering, Trudell deconstructs the temporal nature of romantic relationships, sifting through the sweet pain of love, which can only reveal meaning after love is gone or as its going away.

Itʻs fitting that AKA Grafitti Man was celebrated by a songwriter like Bob Dylan upon its release. Both artists skillfully (and crankily) impart their hard-won wisdom through weathered sensibilities, persons who have sorted through he fragments of their memories to create a narrative of growth through loss. AKA Grafitti Man accomplishes its truth-telling by providing an alternative to pop music tropes, while still doing justice to popular musicʻs road-tested forms.

[unchained-lightner]

     So, I felt like rambling about some random, assorted Kris headcanons because... Well, why not? These apply more to the playerless AU, but a few carry over to other verses, too. This is gonna get long, so... Check under the cut for shenanigans. Also, spoiler warning and all that.

     - Kris really, really doesn’t like being picked up or carried. They’ll tolerate it, and rarely resist efforts to lift them up, but they strongly prefer having both feet firmly placed on the ground. They’re a bit iffy on physical contact in general, actually; Kris is mostly neutral to it, but it’s pretty rare they’ll initiate that contact on their own. If this teen gives you a hug, cherish it because that means a lot coming from them.

     - While Kris is good at making scary expressions and seeming really threatening, they’re actually pretty harmless overall. This behavior can be best compared to a scared kitten puffing up and hissing; unless you really push them, Kris isn’t actually going to do anything. If they don’t like you, they’ll find a much more subtle way of sabotaging your life, or just try avoiding you altogether.

     - Kris is pretty much half and half when it comes to fight or flight; if they’re the one in danger, they’d rather just avoid the conflict and get away. However, if someone else is in danger, Kris will change their tune very quickly. While their combat abilities are focused much more on defense and buffs, Kris is still pretty scrappy in a pinch. That said, their attacks are mediocre at best, especially since Kris doesn’t really want to hurt anybody. Likewise, they’ll also hold back if facing an opponent that's injured; Kris does not like killing, and will attempt to prevent it through any means necessary.

     - This kid eats just about anything. The only ‘foods’ they’d be squeamish about are raw meats, really. That said, while they might have a macabre sense of humor, they actually don’t like eating things that are bloody, or look bloody, hence why they don’t care for the heart donut with its red jelly filling. Kris will be more than happy to pretend to, though, if they think it’ll freak someone out.

     - That said, Kris has an extreme weakness for sweets, especially chocolate. If there is chocolate in the house, you better keep it hidden or they’ll perform a very special magic trick; replacing all chocolate with empty wrappers. Either way, cover something with chocolate and this kid will eat it. Needless to say you should never, ever take them somewhere with a chocolate fountain, because Kris will put absolutely everything in it and they cannot be stopped.

     - Also, Kris has no idea what humans are supposed to be like. They cannot recall meeting another human, since they were put up for adoption at a very young age. Kris lived their entire life in Hometown, which has no other human residents. As a result, they have very mixed feelings concerning their own kind; there’s definitely some bitterness and abandonment issues to unpack, but at the same time, Kris is also very curious too. Yet, due in part to the scary stories they’ve been bombarded with from a young age, and their own rather untrustworthy nature, Kris can’t help but wonder if they’re really missing out on anything.

     - Kris can talk if they want to, they just usually don’t. It’s not even that they’re bad at speaking, they just don’t really like to. As a result, when they do speak, they keep it short and sweet so-to-speak. And if they don’t want to answer you... They just won’t. Instead, you’ll get a very indignant glare, maybe a huff or two. Kris actually prefers using music to connect with others; playing piano comes much more naturally to them, and they’re pretty dang good at it, too. It’s the one talent Kris is really proud of. They occasionally compose as well, though their writing is really messy so it can be hard for other people to decipher.

     - The main reason Kris doesn’t like going to school was the pretty much constant bullying. Being the only human in an all-monsters town, they were chosen as the ‘freak’ at a very young age. Susie didn’t just start picking on them; that’s actually been going on for years. Kris is usually just wily and quick enough to sneak away without her catching them alone. However, Kris refuses to tell anyone else about it; the other kids have a fairly good guess at what’s happening, but the adults don’t really know.

     - Part of Kris and Asriel’s strong bond was that Asriel was one of the few who never treated Kris as some sort of weirdo, and even helped protect them from the bullies. As a result, Kris always felt much safer and more comfortable around them, knowing that at least one other kid accepted them for who they were. Asriel was also the only one who Kris really opened up to, and he knows the kid better than anyone else.

     - Under their bangs, Kris’s eye color can display their current amount of Determination; when the trait is active-- which in turn makes their soul appear red-- their eyes will gleam a deep scarlet color reminiscent of garnets. However, when their trait fades, their eye color fades slightly with it, becoming somewhat washed out and dull. As a result, their eyes will appear more like a pale reddish-brown. But, since their eyes are usually hidden, most people wouldn’t even notice the difference. Also note that when they activate a Determination power, it may even cause their eyes to visibly glow for a moment. This is most common if they’re trying to reset, save, or load.

     - When in a different timeline, Kris may not be able to save over an existing save if their Determination is weaker, but they can still view the information. As a result, they can generally figure out who is currently in control, and how long they’ve been in that position. Kris has no interest in hijacking anyone’s timeline though; if anything, they’ll just be wary of whoever is responsible, knowing there’s someone else out there that can reset at will. That said, Kris can remember resets due to their own relatively high Determination, so even as their opponent learns... They do, too.

     - Kris’s ability to ‘check’ other people can be both a blessing and a curse. They don’t really understand the ‘stats,’ so most of the time it’s more of a vague impression they get from another person, mainly concerning how powerful they are. Moreover, they occasionally check on reflex, without even realizing they’re doing it. Most of the time this is harmless, but a high LV stat will make them intensely uncomfortable; as a result, they’ll be quite wary of those who’ve killed before, regardless of the reason for it. That said, since Kris doesn’t actually know what LV is or how it raises, it’s still fully possible to earn their trust in spite of it.

     - Kris isn’t really an outgoing person, so they’re unlikely to reach out to new people without reason. That said, they can be quite friendly and playful towards those who do succeed in earning their trust and friendship. While Kris actually really hates fighting, they did tend to play a bit rough when they were little. They frequently play-wrestled with Asriel in particular, but over the years Kris has mellowed out quite a bit. Now, this playful streak only really comes out once in a blue moon, and only for people they’re very close with. Also, Kris is actually surprisingly ticklish; this is the easiest way to subdue them if they’re being a little terror.

[aether-asterisk]

meanwhile, in a completely different universe...

including the other 2 ats (alternate timelines) i mentioned a few days ago.

things to note (some may be spoilery so???? read at ur own risk i guess):

?????? does not have stripes on her shirt at all. instead her shirt is a magenta long-sleeve with faux buttons. this means nothing. just casual normal human clothes.

LV2!caffrin’s stripes have slightly faded from their original vivid lime color and seem to have darkened a bit as well. she fears that this means she is filled with depravity (corrupt kindness), but in reality it’s both delusion and regret clouding her true compassion (a mix between kindness and justice). strangely, a slight hint of blue has appeared on her secondary stripes as well. it’s barely noticeable, as if only she can see it. she has no idea what this means.

celynne’s stripes are either green/hot pink (compassion and passion, a mix between perserverence and determination) or light/dark green (compassion/kindness). maybe both and it depends on her mood/energy. they both look so pretty, but i can’t tell which one works best.....

meanwhile, leo’s stripes are light blue (loyalty — patience + integrity) and yellow (justice)

chartreuse and caffy -- caffrin’s shoulder angel/devil pair -- have stopped getting along with eachother since the nightmare. chartreuse blames caffy because she was always the perverted side of caffrin: it would only make sense that she had some unresolved feelings towards a pairing with a similar forbidden concept and repress twisted fantasies of it, despite also depicting the resulting consequences of it; while caffy blames chartreuse for being too damn pushy and paranoid: she always wants caffrin to be at top-notch performance, especially after the way she handled being promoted to full-time conscience -- it wouldn’t be unlike her to conjure a whole worst-case scenario either to warn/prepare her for what would never even happen in a million years or an “if you don’t shape up this is what will happen” type of “motivation”.

they also can’t agree on who’s fault it may have been in the real world -- his or caffrin’s. as in, whether if he was actually going to do that or if caffrin was freaking out over nothing. not that that matters much -- in the end one of them is still a m u r d e r e r .

instead of growing up with an internet dependency/addiction (because she couldn’t even afford a laptop), celynne simply secluded herself in her “room” (because she never had much of a place to call “home” in her childhood) drawing in her sketchbook or even write short stories in a separate notebook...though her ideas can only get her so far, especially when she lacked personal experience. but, she never could bring herself to step outside and ask for advice or even acknowledgement/approval (they probably wouldn’t like it at all anyway), so even her best works -- the very few she’s actually proud of -- were never seen. though in recent years she had gotten better about leaving her comfort zone; her social skills still have a bit of recalibrating to do...

she got a part-time job at a grocery story just to get by, though her “boss” is....far from competent. as much as she wants to quit, she still has to make a living and put herself out there somehow...plus she did make a friend while on the job, so maybe it isn’t that bad after all.

she visits her new friend as much as possible; with leo back in school she isn’t sure if she can handle being alone again. she enjoys being in his company and they have quite a bit in common.

meanwhile, leo has plenty of friends -- including susie, despite all the warnings from his peers. he believes that all she really needs is a good friend. and boy oh boy, did they become friends alright. (like, some time after their trip to the supply closet, when they started hanging out outside of school; sometimes even revisiting the dark world and their old pal ralsei. while leo does think he’s cute, he also admires susie’s passion and strength, and how she could totally pick up and carry ollie over her shoulder (and has maybe dreamt about it more than once) ...and he also thinks she’s cute too.)

currently leo and susie are “lab partners” (though obviously a little more involved than that) and complement eachother quite well: leo keeps susie calm and is constantly teaching her how to be.....well, not aggressive, while susie continues to defend and protect leo with her life -- and her fists. after all they’ve been through together, they feel safe around eachother.

kris watches leo from a distance, as if they were silently judging him. though when asked to join his lunch table, they turn away and return to their lunch. one time, leo swore he saw a red glint in their eye, like they knew something.

celynne was originally gonna be called “charlene” but celynne sounded cooler

celynne and leo are the “delta”verse versions of caffrin and ollie respectively.

i can’t think of anything for the reality check at/au/whatever rn, or at least anything that might completely spoil what the hell’s going on there. plus this is long enough as it is, both in length and time spent writing this seriously i’, pretty sure it’s been like 2 hours invested into these fun facts and a good amount of that time was used to look up what word i wanted to use to describe lv2!caffrin’s current soul trait ughhhh fuck it i’m done for now just take it

[anywhozits]

All I Really Want: Chapter 2

Rating: T

Pairing: Kristanna (at some point lol)

Verse: 90s High School AU / frozen retelling

Read on AO3

This wasn’t Anna’s first rodeo. During her freshman year at Arendelle Prep; hell, even during eighth grade and if she were drunk enough to admit it—that one time halfway through 7th grade when she really, really wanted to smooch Charlie Blower that 9th grader who she ran into in the hallway, she went to these kinds of parties.

The classic Arendelle Prep rager. Rich parents out on some kind of business trip. Way too much vodka. Cheap beer. Hot tubs. Silly games. Maybe a bonfire or two which like, totally wasn’t dangerous at all.

This night was the same as others before it. Bebe Shelley’s parents were out in Cabo for some reason with the “law school buddies” or “law firm buddies” or whatever her gross-ass dad called the ring of people he did lots of coke and called up prostitutes with. Well—not like that last part would happen with the wives present. Or would it.

Anna shuddered—literally—at the thought.

Gross. No. She didn’t want to think of any of that super messed up shit. She couldn’t believe Ashley even told her all of that. But maybe it was a coping mechanism or something.

Her driver, the most illustrious Kai, her aid in everything mischievous she had been up to ever since that 7th grade party where she had succeeded in smooching Charlie Blower, pulled the car up to Bebe’s house.

She took a deep breath. She was nervous for some reason. Probably because she knew Bebe’s sister Ashley would’ve invited the entire junior class and Anna had an inkling she super wanted to smooch tonight, too. And the juniors were the most totally hot grade in the upper school right now. Like, everybody knew it. Even the teachers. She’d heard Mrs. Adamson talking about it in a hushed voice with Mrs. Ingalls at convocation last week.

They were hot. Smoking hot, really. Like, smoking hot period.

And it helped that these were the boys who already were super into freshmen like her. Their first dance of the year, glowdown, was filled with her and her friends finding any way to grind on them. And they liked it too. Clearly. Anna felt that they liked it.

But somehow she made the stupid mistake of starting a grind off with Bebe that distracted from her goal. Sure, she’d won. Twenty-four guys compared to Bebe’s seventeen. But she hadn’t done anything else with them.

So she hadn’t secured herself that man she told herself she wanted since high school started. High school meant romance and drama and maybe a little bit of learning or something, too. But she wanted a high school boyfriend. She wanted someone to light up her life and her heart and she wanted everything that came with having that. She just wanted… someone. She wanted love. She wanted someone to love her.

The car came to a stop. Kai gave Anna a knowing ‘see you in the morning’ nod before ushering her out of the car. She opened the door slowly but slamming it suddenly, confused as to why she didn’t hear the familiar sound of the door banging closed behind her until she remembered that her best friend sat in the seat next to her.

“Wait! Kristoff—sorry. I forgot—” Anna shook her head. “Nevermind. Are you ready?” Anna was just so used to arriving to these kinds of house parties alone. Kristoff usually avoided them, unless Anna was the host, of course, but tonight Anna had begged and begged him until he finally gave in. All she had to do was jut out her lip and give him those classic puppy dog eyes. Rest assured he would do whatever she asked.

“Yeah. I’m ready.” His face was morphed into an extremely dissatisfied pout. Anna imagined he probably regretted agreeing to this whole situation, but she was thankful he came anyway. If this night didn’t go the way she planned, then she’d be happy to instead spend the night with him jumping on trampolines and running around to beat of the Smashing Pumpkins’ guitar riffs.

Kristoff’s drunken air guitar talents were legendary. Every time.

“Um… you sure?” Anna had tried to walk a few paces ahead of him but Kristoff remained firmly planted on the driveway. “You’re not moving at all.”

“Right,” Kristoff said. “Moving. Gotta… move.” Eventually he picked up his pace, shuffling his feet to catch up to Anna. She turned to face him, then, smiling wide at one of the people who consistently lit up her world.

His black Offspring skull t-shirt billowed a little bit in the slight wind of an Orange County January. Anna noticed a little hint of his sketchily acquired Nirvana tattoo sticking out from the sleeve of his left arm. But literally just a glimpse. The curve of the smiley face’s chin.

She thought it was damn awesome that at sixteen years old he already had two tattoos. Like he somehow had the balls to sneak out and find someone who would do that to minors. Someone he ended up befriending, even. He had a connection.

Naturally she’d debated getting one herself, but she still felt too young. Yeah, Kristoff and Anna were in the same grade, but he was basically two years older than her. Somehow, she was only reminded of this when she caught sight of his tattoos. What Anna deemed the ultimate symbol of maturity. Of… advanced age. Of those two years between them.

When Kristoff reached her, Anna grabbed hold of his hand, and they walked hand in hand to the intricately carved mahogany door of the Shelley household. Anna pressed the doorbell, hoping the chime would ring over the S Club 7 blasting through the surround sound.

Thankfully, Ashley pulled open the door. “Ohmygod, Anna!” Ashley bounced up to Anna and hugged her with such force Anna thought she might burst. She could feel the stark, well—hard proof of Ashley’s boob job. A sixteenth birthday present that had set off an endless stream of gossip. “And you brought your friend… Christopher, was it?”

“Kristoff.”

“Right. Well—welcome, Kristoff! Glad you could make it.”

Anna shrugged and clapped her hands together. She felt a jolt of excitement shoot through her. A party! A party was just what she needed to forget about her shit week. Elsa hadn’t called back after Anna had left her at least twelve or thirteen messages and her parents had done nothing but ignore her. But what else was new on that front…her parents were a lost cause. But Elsa. Elsa was busy, though. At her boarding school. Studying hard, probably. And there was also the three-hour time difference. Anna knew that. There were loads of reasons why Elsa didn’t call back. She couldn’t be disappointed.

She wouldn’t be.

So, Anna smiled through it. She tried her very best to swallow the tremble in her voice. “I need something to drink.” Not one crack. Not one break. She always did such a great job hiding.

“You know where to find those,” Ashley added with a wink. She ushered Kristoff and Anna to the kitchen and made a beeline for what appeared to be the dance floor.

Anna skipped—literally skipped—to the kitchen, Kristoff stumbling behind her and nodding nervously when she handed him a shot of vodka. He took one whiff and scrunched up his face. He wasn’t usually a shot guy but Anna brought it out in him.

She knew he had some stuff he wanted to forget, too.

“Threetwoone!” Her countdown was decidedly not a countdown. Both Anna and Kristoff grimaced intensely when the liquid stung their throats and then chased the vodka heavily with some Sunny D.

“Another one?” Kristoff asked, feeling nothing. What a heavyweight. Anna remained incredibly jealous. A couple months ago, Olaf told Anna that she could never go shot to shot with Kristoff and her own stupid dumb naïve stubbornness made her do it. That night had ended so poorly. Probably. Well—no way it could have ended any other way. Anna didn’t remember anything past shot number nine. Her throat burned for days from all the barfing she did.

But tonight, she figured she’d keep to a limit. A few drinks behind Kristoff at all times. Except for now… “Let’s do it!”

So they did. Switching to a chaser of Hawaiian punch this time. Kristoff had definitely poured at least a shot and a half into their red solo cups, but Anna was grateful for it, honestly. Now she felt the perfect amount of buzz for her Junior Boy Hunt. That sounded like an okay name for this quest. Junior Boy Hunt. Had some mediocre ring to it.

She’d keep it for now.

Kristoff took one more shot and then grabbed himself a beer but not before pouring Anna a vodka cranberry.

“Thanks, Kris,” Anna said. “I’m going to take a lap, I think.”

“Okay. I’ll be here, probably. Or… looking for Olaf. I think he said he might come.”

Anna nodded and smiled at him, thinking to herself that this was where and how Junior Boy Hunt began. She held the red solo cup so tightly her knuckles started to turn white. She massaged her lip between her teeth in sheer resolve. Her eyes roamed over the crowd of people on the dance floor.

They all seemed mostly paired off.

Then she looked at the living room. Also pairs.

Jesus. Was this some kind of a hook up party and she didn’t get the memo to arrive early enough to secure her place?

Whatever.

She pivoted in her Vans to run outside, but right as she did, she bumped straight into someone and the entirety of her vodka cranberry spilled all over the front of her shirt. “Ooof!” She yelled, laughing just as she always did when she did something clumsy. Because. Classic Anna, let’s be real.

“Whoa!” The mysterious human wall grabbed her shoulders to stabilize himself. But then he ran his hands along her arms and held onto her hands right as he stared into her eyes and then Anna realized oh shit this human wall was a guy who was actually really, really hot and maybe this was, like, fate or something because hot DAMN. He wore a pink Lacoste collared shirt which seemed to make his bright red hair sparkle. His most striking feature—by far—was his eyes, filled with a beautiful, engulfing green that swirled in a shocking mixture of mischievousness and confidence. She’d never in her entire life seen eyes that color. Like… an emerald. It captivated her. She didn’t want to move. “I’m sorry about that… oh, fuck. Your drink… on your…” His eyes drifted down to her white tank top. He was definitely staring at her cleavage. Anna puffed out her chest a little bit in response.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. I get distracted by—um, I run into people a lot. I mean, I’m really clumsy. I guess. It’s not because you’re hot or anything. Well, you are hot, but I don’t… that’s not why I ran into you, it’s more just because I wasn’t looking—I didn’t notice you were hot until, well, right now, and—”

“I’m Hans,” he said and Anna exhaled. So she hadn’t made a complete fool of herself with her rambling. Those little blessings. “Westergaard.”

“Anna Larsen.” There was a slight twinkle in his eyes when she said this.

“You go to Arendelle Prep?”

“Yeah. I’m in Bebe’s grade.”

He chuckled. “Fresh meat.”

“Yup! And you’re a…?”

“Junior. Ashley’s my good um… friend.” Except the way he said that made Anna think maybe they were something more than friends and it made her nervous. “I’m sure she could give you a new shirt.”

“Oh, I don’t really care about the stain.”

“It’s a little see-through.”

Anna blushed. Hard. She definitely had cheeks the shade of ketchup and it only made it worse that he still held onto her hands. Thank the Lord she had bought a new metallic green bathing suit last week.  

“You know, I think I recognize you from somewhere,” Hans said. “Are you on the volleyball team?”

She blushed again. “Yeah. I am. Volleyball, basketball, and track, actually.” Technically track season hadn’t started yet, but she found it important to mention anyway.

“My friends and I… we like watching the volleyball games.”

Anna laughed nervously. She could feel it… now was the time to be bold. Now was the time to really put the Junior Boy Hunt plan into action. “So, um… wanna get me a new drink? And you can… um—meet me outside?” Anna tried her best to be assertive. She wanted him to know she was interested and more than anything else she needed him to know that she was mature. She was a freshman, sure—fresh meat or whatever he had said earlier, but this wasn’t her first party, and this wasn’t her first time making out with somebody the first night she met them.

“Vodka cranberry?”

“Make it a vodka soda this time. Don’t wanna ruin any more clothes.”

He laughed at her and she went giddy. Her heart fluttered a mile a minute. Okay. Not too shabby. Junior Boy Hunt was already a resounding success. She spun around to watch him walk to the kitchen and stared longingly at the way he poured her drink. Kristoff had disappeared somewhere, probably looking for Olaf. She’d meet up with him later. No worries.

So, then Anna skipped excitedly outside, finding a perfect spot next to the fire where she could see herself spending the rest of the night with Hans. What a thrill. She couldn’t wait.

She discarded her tank top, pleased enough to have a solid vodka-cranberry soiled excuse to show off her new bikini, fixed her braids, and pulled down her jean cutoff shorts. Biting her lip while she tried to determine how much of her abs would peek through while sitting on this chair.

Laying herself out in as Barbie as a pose as she could, Anna found her footing. Her body glistened in the light of the crackling fire, her freckles on display. Her shorts low enough on her hips to showcase her small waist and her voluptuous booty. Well. Not that he would really be able see her booty since she had to use it to, like, sit on. But still. She looked enrapturing like this and she knew it.

She counted down the seconds until she figured he would come back with their drinks and see her like this. Thrilled.

But then.

“Oh, hey, Anna,” Kristoff said, sliding into the spot next to her on the patio couch.

Anna shot to attention, emerged from her Barbie pose, and scooted a little bit away from him. “Oh. Kristoff. Hi.” Her eyes darted about, trying to see if she saw Hans anywhere. She didn’t want him to be turned off by the fact she now spoke to a guy like twice his size. Hans didn’t know that Kristoff was just a friend. And what if, seeing her here… he thought that it meant she found somebody new. That she didn’t want him. Because that wasn’t the case. Like, literally at all. Obviously. Anna had… maybe a couple times considered smooching Kristoff. Maybe a couple. Well, technically handful was the better word to describe how many times she’d had that thought. But that didn’t mean she liked him liked him. She just liked him as a friend. And sometimes it was hard to separate friend feelings from romantic feelings and… besides.

He definitely thought of her has a friend. A little sister he had said once. And it still made her stomach sink even thinking of the night he said those two words.

“You couldn’t find Olaf?”

“I’m not so sure he’s here. I looked all over.”

“Oh, well…” Anna started panicking a bit. She knew Hans had to be on his way, and if her big brother or best friend whatever the heck he was to her cock blocked her like this she would be pissed. Her eyes beat back and forth and back and forth. She didn’t see the flash of Hans’s red hair anywhere. For now, she was safe. But only for now. “Listen—”

Kristoff smiled softly. “Have I ever told you how cute you look in braids?”

The comment made Anna blush and momentarily forgot her mission. “No.”

“Well, you do. You—”

But then she saw Hans walking through the sliding glass door. And she got desperate. “Kristoff, um… I think it’s best—I need to—”

“Anna!” Hans somehow squeezed his way between the two of them on the couch. Kristoff recoiled and exhaled in a pout. “Got you these.” He handed her not one but two vodka sodas. For himself, he had chosen some generic looking beer bottle. “Thought you looked thirsty.”

Anna was happy to double fist. She felt like she needed some added liquid confidence for this next part of her quest.

“Who’s this guy?” Hans said this in a way that made it seem like Kristoff didn’t sit so close to him that their thighs rubbed together.

“That’s Kristoff. He’s my friend. Um…He was just leaving.” She’d explain everything to him later. But for now she felt bad.

Kristoff slouched, and his eyes shot to the floor. He looked so dejected that guilt churned within Anna’s stomach. But slowly he got up, nodding, not quite looking into Anna’s eyes when he said, “Yup. I need to… um. Bye.”

Anna exhaled slowly. Everything would be fine once she explained it to him. He probably already knew what the deal was.

So, she tried to put that thread of guilt out of her mind.

“Sorry about that. He’s great, I promise. He’s just… he gets overwhelmed at parties like this.” Anna moved in closer to Hans, trying to recreate her earlier pose. She took a sip of one of the drinks, placing the other one carefully on the floor. It was strong. Hans had blessed her with a heavy pour. She took a couple more gulps of the vodka and then cleared her throat. “So… where do you live?” Anna mentally kicked herself. What kind of a way to start the conversation was this?

“Newport.”

“Oh—um. Beach or Coast? I live in Newport Coast.”

“Beach. Port streets.”

“Awesome,” Anna said, exhaling. Trying to decide what her next move was. She took a few sips of the vodka soda, thankfully feeling a bit more buzzed. He had to have put at least two shots in it. “I—um—my family has a beach house on the Peninsula. Not too far from the Fun Zone, um. If you’ve ever been.”

“The Fun Zone?” His whole entire face lit up and he instantly became even dreamier. “Sure I’ve been. First ferris wheel I ever went on.”

Hans’s hand found Anna’s upper thigh and she instantly felt both a pressure down below and a heart heaving thrill of excitement the second he did. His eyes fell to her bikini again.

And then. Right then.

Anna knew she had him in the palm of her hand. She didn’t feel nervous anymore.

“The ferris wheel is great,” she laughed, effortlessly. “We used to go there all the time when I was little. My dad spun me too hard on the Drummer Boy and I threw up next to the trash can. Like, I was so close to making it an elegant barf that nobody had to clean up or anything but nope. I failed. Literally… adjacent to the trash can.”

Hans laughed now. Heartily.

Yes. Nice work, Anna. You’re funny. You’ve got this. Two points to Anna in the Junior Boy Hunt. And then, while still laughing, he moved his hand a little further up on her thigh. Two more points. “My sister made it to the bathroom. Barfed in the toilet. And I think that moment really set us on our life trajectories. Class Act Elsa and Hot Mess Anna.”

He laughed again. She had to give herself at least five points for that one.

“Elsa’s your sister?”

“Mmhmm. She’s like a super genius. Goes to this uppity boarding school in New England and will probably end up at Harvard or something after she graduates in May,” Anna said cheerily, chugging her drink. Willing herself to forget those unanswered phone calls. “And… meanwhile here I am.” She sipped—more like slurped—her drink at least thrice. “Hot.” Sip. “Mess.” Sip. She gulped. Time for a redirection. “Do you have any siblings?”

“Twelve.”

Now Anna laughed. “You’re joking.”

“Nope. I’m the youngest of thirteen. All brothers.”

“I’m jealous,” Anna said. Meaning it wholeheartedly. She’d love to have a house that full. But then she noticed Hans looking at her sideways and she recoiled. “Is that weird?” Hans didn’t answer her, he just ran his hand along her cheek. So slowly, so delicately that Anna felt herself shiver. “Must’ve been chaotic, then. Going to The Fun Zone as a pack of thirteen kids.”

“Yeah, my brothers were assholes about it. Always trying to force me on Scary Dark Ride.”

“What? You’re telling me you were scared?” Anna cackled. Literally cackled. “That ride’s so lame! Like, totally not scary. At all.”

Hans’s voice got lower, edging on husky when he said, “Maybe I’ll let you force me on it sometime.”

Anna’s heart almost stopped right there. He wanted to go out with her, like, on a date? Probably? That was a date, right? He meant this as a date? The two of them going to The Fun Zone. Maybe he meant in a group. Like a group of them would go and a group of them ride the ride and then get some ice cream and hang out at her beach house or something. But then Anna took a few more horrid burning sips of her drink and decided… fuck it. “You mean like a date?” She scooted even closer to him somehow and pushed her upper arms against her top. She didn’t have the biggest boobs. Well, definitely not compared to Ashley and her fake-ass ones, but she still knew how to show them off. And Hans seemed interested, so…

She tucked a loose strand of hair around her ear and chugged the last bit of one vodka soda as she waited for his answer.

But it never came.

Instead, she felt the warmth of his lips covering her own. His arm snaked around her waist and he pulled her on top of him, so she straddled him with ease.

“You’re beautiful,” he said between kisses.

Her heart fluttered at those words. Damn did it feel good to be complimented like that. To feel, even if only for a few minutes, that she was the center of somebody else’s world.

Anna could say nothing but, “You’re really hot. Like, really hot. Hot damn hot.” She laughed. Rambling again. “Okay I’m gonna stop talking now.”

She grabbed onto the back of his head and pulled him in closer, so they kissed deeper, tongues fighting for dominance.

He was by far the best kisser of the maybe seven-or-so people Anna had kissed in her life. There was something startling about it, honestly. Nobody else could measure up.

Hans knew what he was doing. He really, really knew what he was doing. And as his hand squeezed her ass, Anna let out a delighted moan. Shit. Yeah. This guy knew.

Eventually they transitioned to the porch swing, and then to the hammock, and then to a patch of grass by the hammock, and then the trampoline, and finally the hot tub. Both vodka sodas were finished now, the empty cups sitting by the fire, next to the pile of their discarded clothes. Anna still straddled him, kissing him deeply, thoroughly enjoying the new sensation the hot water provided.

It seemed the rest of the party-goers had cleared out of the backyard. Only the sounds of TLC kept them company. And maybe it was all the alcohol or maybe it was the sense of utter euphoria she felt after these hours with Hans, but damn kissing Hans almost felt like chasing waterfalls…. And that definitely meant that she had at least one million points in the Junior Boy Hunt.

But she wanted to take it a little bit further. To secure her spot. Maybe she needed a billion points to win her own game. “Um… are you sleeping here tonight?”

“That was the plan,” he said, crooning. “Are you?”

“Yeah. Duh. Always.”

“Your parents don’t want you back home?”

Anna laughed in spite of herself and rolled her eyes. “My parents are happy I’m not there to bother them.”

Hans grabbed hold of one of her braids and twirled it in his fingers. “Can I say something crazy?”

Anna nodded.

“I think I love you.”

Her jaw dropped. In a totally unladylike way as her mom would say if she even cared enough to criticize her daughter. Anna did a double take. “Wait, what?”

“I think I love you, Anna,” he repeated. His eyes sparkled in the moonlight. Those absolutely brilliant green eyes. Her heart skipped a beat and what she felt in that moment—that pure, raw, unadulterated pull toward him and only him… it must have been love.

“Oh—wow. I… um—” She blushed, slowly growing more confident. Love. Yes. This was love. “I think I love you, too.”

Their lips met again, more passionately, more purposeful. She felt hot all over and not just from the… you know—hot water of the hot tub and all that.

She had certainly received a billion points. No doubt about it.

And they stayed outside for the rest of the night. The two of them. They moved from the hot tub and back to the grass, back to the couch, back to the trampoline. They watched the stars, they split a bottle of wine, they made s’mores.

They fell asleep wrapped in each other’s arms.

And Anna knew this was love. This was exactly what love felt like.

To be someone’s world and someone’s rock and someone’s other half.

She loved love. She loved Hans.

This was the best night of her life.